This excerpt from The Way to Dr. Bourru: A Watson Mystery starring Inspector Martin appears courtesy of Tall Tail Books.

 

On the Perspicacity of Inspector Martin

It seemed that if ever a stalemate occurred
with respect to some grave situation,
the Inspector depended for wisdom and counsel
on the effects of a strange visitation.
And the form that this took was far sillier still,
for whenever he was in a pickle,
inevitably, from its base to its tip,
his small finger would start to tickle!
This happened each and every time,
And then his words would start to rhyme.
And next, the pounding in his chest
would give him cause to hold his breath.
And while he pondered his decision,
all at once would cross his vision…
The answer — Yes! — so plain to see!
And once he knew the route to go
his finger would inform his toe,
and then his toe would tell his chest,
which allowed him to expel his breath.
When all of this was said and done,
the Inspector and his choice were one!

Today’s Poetry Month selection is by Winston H.N. Wombat:

I believe

that winning is losing
and losing is winning
commence at the end
and cease at the beginning.
that sadness is joy
and happiness is sorrow.
I believe in today
but what about tomorrow?

We continue our April celebration of Park poetry with the award-winning work of Marcus Mosquito:

 

Blood Brothers

And your blood becomes mine
And mind yours
in a ceremony
that our parents would have laughed at
played out in the sun
between friends.

We will recreate this time
each time my sword
pierces your skin
and we join together
in betrayal and love.

 

The popular Park musical group, The Feral Four, has released the lyrics to its controversial new song several months ahead of the original schedule.

Giuseppe, Giancarlo, and the Cross-Eyed Guy, had already become a hot topic on social media, as Animals posted harsh criticisms of it on Gewper and GooseBook even before they knew all the song’s lyrics.

One Gewper member, who goes by the name of “Due Claus” called it “an affront to Feline sensibilities,” while another accused the group of “sycophantic tendencies that should be treated before they become accepted in The Park.”

The group’s manager, however, shrugs off the criticism.

“It all comes with the territory. Animals are sensitive about their relationships with Humans…and rightly so. But the song is definitely not sycophantic with regard to Humans. It is meant to depict life in the Feral Feline community outside The Park and I think it does that quite well.”

A big part or the controversy over the song stems from the fact that the group has fashioned the lyrics to the rhythm of a song that was written by a Human.

“This is the first time that Park musicians have done such a thing…it’s bound to cause a stir,” says Angus Katydid, head of the Association of Park Radio Stations (APRS).

While most members of The Park’s musical community have chosen not to comment on the song, The Cynics sent this message to the group, through their manager, Damien Skyle:

“You know it’s authentic when it causes an uproar. Go the distance and don’t back down!”

Today’s poem is by Marcel-Marcelle T. Snail, Jr., who is best known in The Park as one of the founders of the Slow Art Movement (SAM).

 

 SnailMale
HermaphroDart

Whose conquest is this, anyway?
Our species will survive,
no matter who claims victory.
Still, my male half-self takes aim
to overpower you,
to shower you,
with love darts
from the heart.

Today’s poetry selection is by Aubrey Ant, a seventh generation Park citizen.

If the Shoe Fits

In the distance
your fair voice calls me –
traversing walkways, skirting cracks,
you steer me home.
Then I see it:
so large,
yet carefully crafted.
Fuzzy velcro at its side.
Now it is dark.
He, the wearer, calls out to you,
but you cannot hear him.
His voice, teases,
singing
“Family man?”

As April continues, we proudly present more of the creative work of Park Animals.  Today’s poem was written by Setsuko Macaque, a first generation Park citizen who was a proud member of the swim team in the 26 AZ (2008) Interspecial Summer Games.

Homage to Imo

Koshima Island
Sweet potatoes in the dirt
Imo, our teacher

 

April is “Poetry Month” in the Human world and that has inspired us to publish some of the most beautiful poems that Park Animals have written.

Today’s entry is by Pietro Parrot, an outspoken member of The Park’s Avian community. Pietro’s work has appeared in The Mammalian Daily (Issue #110), as well as in Poetance and other Park poetry journals.

 

Polly: Wanna Cracker?

  and all thoughts
of heaven and earth
diminish
then converge
upon us

in our loneliness
and grief
at being struck
by mediocrity

Our newest literary magazine has issued a curious invitation to The Park’s creative community: please read us, but don’t try to write for us.

Grains of Truth, a journal that describes itself as “the embodiment of excellence” and “publisher of only the best in Animal writing” sent its first edition to store shelves less than a week ago. Along with it came an insert that warned writers not to attempt to have their work published in the journal.

The insert, which begins, “Dear Writers,” outlines the magazine’s policy vis-à-vis unsolicited submissions:

“While we maintain great respect for the work of The Park’s artistic community, we have neither the Animalpower nor the will to sift through piles of submissions in search of material to publish in our magazine. We appreciate your interest in our journal and hope that you enjoy reading the excellent fiction you find in it.”

The magazine’s editor, Dorine Ovella, declined The Mammalian Daily’s invitation to clarify the submission policy. Through a spokesAnimal, however, she issued this statement:

“We meant no offence to any writer when we issued our submission statement. We are a private journal and, as such, we reserve the right to publish work that is to our taste and, hopefully, to the taste of our readers.”