The names of the 35 Animals who will form The Park’s 2014 government have been released. In accordance with Section 127, subsection XII, of The Park’s Constitution, the list of new Archons was posted at the Law Courts early this morning, an hour after the selection was certified by Mr. Justice Augustus Dindon of The Park’s Superior Court. The list will remain posted at the Law Courts until the end of the week so that Park citizens and residents … [Read all...]
Breaking News
OTD in 2017—Park eateries to host “T-1” celebration tomorrow before Archons announced on Sunday
It's an idea whose time has come, say The Park's restaurateurs. And that time is tomorrow night. At exactly five o'clock, every one of The Park's eateries and bars will fling open its doors for one long celebration in anticipation of the announcement of the 2017 Archons. The Park-wide eating and drinking fest, which they're calling, "T-1: Eat, Drink, and Be Merry," is the brainchild of Beatrice Orang, owner of Provisions by Petrounel, and … [Read all...]
OTD in 2015—Without even a budget, what will be the legacy of our 2014 government?
A failed budget, citizen unrest, poverty, threats to safety, interspecial tension ... The list of The Park's problems is long but the shorter one, it appears, is that of the accomplishments of the 2014 Archons. "Things looked so promising ... with [Chief Archon] Buckminster Moose and his take-charge attitude. We thought he could really set The Park straight," said Ronald Grouse, chief political analyst at The Avian Messenger during an … [Read all...]
OTD in 2016—Countdown to our next government: 2016 Archons to be announced Friday
The names of the 35 Animals who will form The Park’s 2016 government will be released on Friday. In accordance with Section 127, subsection XII, of The Park’s Constitution, the list of new Archons will be posted at the Law Courts in the early hours of January 15, exactly an hour after the selection is certified by Mr. Justice Augustus Dindon of The Park’s Superior Court. The Mammalian Daily will publish the list on its web site as soon as … [Read all...]
More Park News
OTD in 2013—DWBS shuts down Otter Ice Slide following tragic accident
The Department of Well-Being and Safety has shut down the Otter Ice Slide for an "indefinite period of time" after a tragic accident occurred there on Wednesday afternoon. In a statement issued this … [Read All About It Here...]
OTD in 2017—“Sortition Shakes” on the rise as citizens feel the strain of possible Archonship
No, it's not a snack. Or even a dance. It's a real psychological condition that afflicts Park citizens. And it's on the rise. According to Park therapists, cases of "Sortition Shakes" or "Lottery … [Read All About It Here...]
OTD in 2015—Lawsuit brought by Simply Structures may “have legs,” says legal expert
The lawsuit filed by Simply Structures against the Park Archons and the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations may "have legs," according to Delwyn Terrier, founding partner of Terrier, … [Read All About It Here...]
Accolades from Margaret Atwood
The Mammalian Daily “Lightens The Morning Cup o’ Gloom,” says Margaret Atwood
