The Mammalian Daily

Original Publication Date: 06 October 2013 Rapper Will.o.be. will stand trial in December on one charge of mischief and two charges of assault on a living being, it was announced today. The charges relate to the singer's alleged defacing of an Oak Tree during the last evening of the Beats of Burden music festival in September. With his legal representative by his side, the rapper appeared before Mr. Justice Augustus Dindon yesterday … [Read all...]

Original Publication Date: 24 September 2015 Hieronymous Hedgehog is the new face of GoUnderground, The Park's oldest and largest hibernation outfitter. The company announced today that it has signed an agreement with The Park's much-beloved Hedgehog to produce a series of advertisements that will appear in Park newspapers, magazines, and on television. The ads will commence in October and will run until the end of November. "We are … [Read all...]

Original Publication Date: 4 December 2014 With little more than six weeks to go before their term ends, the 2014 Archons have decided to consult Park citizens before they release the revised version of the 2015 budget. At a press conference yesterday, press secretary to the Archons Balthasar Alouatta confirmed that the Archons, in conjunction with the Park Finance Office (PFO), will be hosting a "consultation event" at the Wishing Well … [Read all...]

Original publication date: 30 August 2012 Renowned Park film director and proud University of West Terrier alumnus, Douglas Cheetah, is hard at work on a new documentary that he says will be ready for release in time for the 2013 Park Interspecial Film Festival (PIFF). Best known for his controversial 2007 (25 AZ) film, Black Cats Can't Jump, Cheetah has turned his attention to the interspecial family which, he says, can be found in all … [Read all...]