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Lovely to look at - Book by Noreen

OTD in 2015—Head nurse heads to UWT School of Medicine as part-time faculty member

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Hermione Hippo

Newly-minted UWT Assistant Professor Hermione Hippo

Nurse Hermione Hippo is about to become Professor Hermione Hippo.

The veteran Park health professional and current head nurse at the Park Hospital for the Afflicted and Infirm has been invited to join the faculty at the University of West Terrier School of Medicine on a part-time basis as an Assistant Professor.

In an announcement posted yesterday on the University’s web site, the President and Governors said Hermione would be a “great asset” to the student body.

“A nurse and healer both by nature and vocation, Hermione brings with her many fine qualities and a wealth of experience that will benefit UWT students,” the announcement went on to say.

Hermione Hippo’s nursing career began at a zoological garden south of The Park. After she arrived in The Park, she immediately found employment with Dr. Bourru. In 2004, she accepted the position of head nurse at the Park Hospital for the Afflicted and Infirm, where she will continue to work. Among her credits are the containment of Small Ball Fever in 2007 and of Tulip-Related Illness in 2013.

Read the University’s full announcement here.

OTD in 2015—SuperGoof! comic plans June launch

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SuperGoof graphic

SuperGoof! comic book will launch in June during The Park’s Enforced Domestication Awareness Month

It’s not a drone. It’s not a puppet. It’s not even a toy.

It’s SuperGoof!, a new comic series that’s set to launch this coming June and which may prove to be the most powerful weapon in The Park’s anti-enforced domestication arsenal.

Conceived and produced by Anastazja Koci, an alumna of the Hani Gajah School of Art, the project was supported in part by the Founding Families Financial Corporation, in association with the Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS).

“We are always on the lookout for new ways to warn Animals about the dangers of enforced domestication,” says DWBS Director of Public Relations, Cornelius Kakapo.

“When Anastazja brought this to us, we hopped on board right away.”

The series chronicles the lives of two Domestic Animals: one Feline and one Canine, also known as the “SuperGoofs.”

The first book shows them in their formative years, learning “the tricks of the trade,” as the Canine puts it.

“In the first book, the Animals have no names,” Koci explains. “When they are addressed, it’s with terms of endearment…’Sweetie,’ ‘Precious,” that sort of thing. They have no identity outside of their rôles as pets.”

One of the most important lessons that comes from the first book is that Domestic Animals are not free to be themselves.

“It was a difficult choice to make, but I thought it was important to illustrate that the life of a Domestic Animal is not the true life of an Animal. I want to show Park Animals what it’s like not to be allowed to find your own food, to express your own personality, to make your own friends,” Koci says.

While she says the food issue was the most important to her, the title of the series says far more about the project as a whole.

“I’ve often been asked, ‘Why SuperGoofs?’ It’s hard to explain if you’ve never been in a Human household,” says Koci, who spent two years as a pet before moving to The Park.

“Humans like to be entertained by Animals. They like to be made to laugh. If an Animal wants to be fed, have a warm bed and be protected from the elements, she’d better make herself entertaining and snuggly. And research has shown that being ‘goofy’ and pretending to be not so bright can go a long way with Humans.”

The DWBS’s Kakapo says he thinks the project’s launch this year is a particularly timely one.

“After such a hard Winter, Animals might be thinking that it’s easier to succumb to domestication and a life with Humans. I think SuperGoofs! will go a long way toward convincing them otherwise,” he says.

The Park’s Enforced Domestication Awareness Month runs from 1-30 June.

OTD in 2013—UWT expansion to include art gallery

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UWT Coat of Arms

The University of West Terrier has announced plans to open an art gallery on its campus.

At a press conference held during the annual UWT open house on January 29, Bibiano Montanaro, spokesAnimal for the President of the University, confirmed that several architectural firms have submitted plans for a two-storey facility that will house paintings, sculpture, and textiles by Park artists. The gallery will form a significant part of the institution’s expansion over the next five years.

“The University of West Terrier wishes to broaden its commitment to The Park’s artistic and cultural community and we feel that this is an important first step toward that goal,” Montanaro said.

The University will be seeking a curator and other staff members for the gallery as soon as building commences, Montanaro said, but he refused to confirm rumours that the curator has already been selected from the faculty of The Park’s Hani Gajah School of Art.

OTD in 2017—Historian and author Pieter N. Paard to speak at Sunday’s UWT Open House

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UWT COATThe President and Governors of the University of West Terrier have announced that Pieter N. Paard will speak at the University’s annual Open House on January 29, 2017.

Paard, a UWT professor of history, is the author of several books, including From Slavery to Freedom: A History of Pack Animals and, most recently, The Fierce Urgency of Miaow: Jor and the Feline Roots of Zoocracy (February release). Pieter Paard has also appeared on Yannis Tavros’s Toro Talk Radio show and is a member of The Mammalian Daily’s Groundhog Day commentating crew.

Paard will talk about his research on the organic roots of zoocracy and the place of Animal self-rule in the wider world.

Read the university’s full announcement here.

Annual Open House • 29 January 2017
Snacks, beverages, and brochures will be available from 12:00 until 20:30

OTD in 2016—Raymond H. Mink bows out of UWT gig

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UWT COAT

The University of West Terrier is scrambling to find a replacement for Raymond H. Mink, who was scheduled to speak at the UWT Annual Open House on January 29.

Mink had planned to deliver a short address on the subject of the rôle that higher education plays in the maintenance of peace, order, and interspecial harmony on January 29, according to an announcement posted on the university’s web site.

The Mammalian Daily learned this morning that Mink, who has been The Park’s Chief Officer of Peace for over five years, bowed out of the speaking engagement on January 17, a day after he was selected as The Park’s 2016 Chief Archon.

In a short communiqué sent to the university, Balthasar Alouatta, spokesAnimal for the Archons, said that Mink felt it inappropriate “at this time” to appear at the event.

“While he acknowledges the great importance of education and of inspiring The Park’s young, His Honour believes that his focus at this time should be on governing. He would be grateful to the University of West Terrier for granting him this time and he would be more than happy to appear at a future event,” the communiqué said.

For their part, the UWT President and Governors issued a statement saying that though they were disappointed in Mink’s decision, they understood that this was primarily an issue of timing.

“We understand the newly-assumed burdens of the Chief Archon and we are happy to arrange for him to speak at the university at a later time. We wish him every success in his new position,” the statement said.

The next time the Chief Archon will be heard from will be on Groundhog Day, when he reads the all-important Archons’ Address.

OTD in 2012—The University of West Terrier needs your support!

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For the first time in its history, The University of West Terrier is asking those outside the institution for their support.

In a statement released today, the Governors of the University respectfully requested “a little help from our friends”:

As is the case currently with almost all academic institutions, UWT is having trouble meeting its financial commitments. These commitments, of course, constitute our academic commitments.  We, therefore, are asking for a little help from our friends. If you or your friends are UWT alumni, please consider purchasing our new commemorative mug. If you reside inside The Park, show your commitment to higher education by doing the same. If you reside outside The Park, remember your friends of all species and order a mug to support their future. Do it for yourself, do it for your family, do it for your friends. Do it for the future. We’ll all be better off for it.

Thank you.”

The purchase of UWT Commemorative Mugs is supported by The Mammalian Daily. If you are interested in acquiring one or more mugs, please email us at orders@mammaliandaily.com.

OTD in 2015—Faramund Stinktier signs two-book deal with Prionailurus Press

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Faramund Stinktier

Stinktier memoir, “The Skunk Who Would Be A Zebra” to be published next year.

Faramund Stinktier has signed a lucrative two-book deal with Prionailurus Press.

The Reekabilly star, composer, and the most famous half of the SCENTient Beings duo announced yesterday that he has come to a “very favourable arrangement” with the esteemed Park publisher.

In a separate press release, Momoko Yamaneko, Editor-in-Chief of Prionailurus Press, confirmed the deal.

“Prionailurus Press is pleased to announce that, in keeping with our most recent mandate, we have welcomed Faramund Stinktier to our stable of writers. We look forward to working with him on two books, the first of which will be published in the coming year,” the press release said.

The name of that book, according to the press release, is “The Skunk Who Would Be A Zebra,” and as its title suggests, it is Stinktier’s memoir.

The singer shocked Park residents when he announced in September that he believed he was always meant to be a Zebra. He made the announcement while a guest on the Yannis Tavros radio show. In the few months that have followed, he says, he has experienced “great joy” but also “enormous sorrow” due to his shunning by members of his own and other species.

The publisher’s press release contains no information on the second book, but it is believed to be a book about music.

Prionailurus Press announced last April that it intended to promote the work of The Park’s striped and spotted community and in a brief telephone interview, Yamaneko confirmed that this is the mandate to which she referred in her company’s communiqué.

SCENTient Beings will perform at the Celebration of the Winter Solstice on December 21.

OTD in 2016—Prestigious prize goes to UWT professor for pioneering work on harrumphocytes

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UWT COATDr. Jagger Zebu, Professor of Mammalian Medicine at the University of West Terrier’s School of Medicine has been awarded the prestigious Eureka Prize, it was announced today.

The announcement came in a statement issued this morning by the editorial board of the scientific journal Eureka. The board, which awards the prize annually for “pioneering research and innovative experimentation,” called Dr. Zebu a “a meticulous scientist and a pioneer in harrumphocyte research.”

Dr. Zebu, whose name appeared earlier this month on Eureka’s  “Seventeen to Watch in 2017” list, led a team of researchers who were the first to pinpoint the location of harrumphocytes in Mammals.  Harrumphocytes are the cells that are believed to be responsible for producing feelings of primary apathy and secondary negativity in Mammals.

When the research was published in March of this year, Dr. Zebu said he believed the breakthrough would offer a “much-improved” life to Mammals who suffer from harrumphocyte imbalance.

Although Dr. Zebu has not commented on the award, the Board of Governors of the University of West Terrier posted a congratulatory message on the university’s web site this morning.

OTD in 2016—Noreen to chair UWT forum on effects of Human architecture on other Animals

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Official NoreenThe President and Governors of the University of West Terrier announced today that Noreen will chair a forum on the effects of Human architecture on the lives of other Animals. The forum, which will be hosted by the UWT School of Architecture, will take place on the university’s campus on October 8 and 9.

The university called the Mammalian Daily advice columnist and adjunct professor of Human studies the “perfect choice” to chair the discussion because “her abilities as a mediator and as a researcher are exceptional.”

Participants in the forum will include faculty members of the UWT School of Architecture as well as faculty of the Schools of Medicine and Economics and Social Science. In addition, the university has invited community architects and professionals working in the fields of physical and mental health and well-being to share their knowledge and expertise.

OTD in 2015—UWT Art Gallery, Park Museum vie for art of endangered species

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Underwater Mammal ArtThe soon to be opened new art gallery at the University of West Terrier is engaged in a battle with the Park Museum for the opportunity to house and display a selection of works by members of The Park’s endangered species.

Although some of the pieces in question formed part of the 2015 Park ART Walk in August, most of the artists whose works were displayed have to date refused invitations from The Park’s art galleries in favour of private showings, most often at their own abodes.

“Obviously, this would be a real coup for us, but that is by no means the only reason we want to house the art,” said Bibiano Montanaro, spokesAnimal for the President of the University, in an interview on TMD Radio yesterday.

“As an educational institution, we feel we are the appropriate place for this art and that’s why we are engaged in this battle. But, I must say, we didn’t think we would have to fight at all, let alone this hard,” he said.

For its part, The Park Museum maintains that its mission is to house as much as it can that is representative of life in The Park.

“That means, past, present and even future,” says curator Dorika Pumi, who failed in her attempts as curator of the Park Museum of Contemporary Art (PMoCA) to attract artists who were members of endangered species.

And although Pumi contends that this “isn’t personal at all,” many in The Park’s art world believe otherwise.

“I don’t blame her for trying to redeem herself, but I don’t think she should do it on the backs of endangered artists,” says Anastazja Koci, an alumna of the Hani Gajah School of Art. Koci, who was shortlisted for the position of curator at the UWT art gallery, says she was taught by Pumi and maintains the utmost respect for her.

“But I think she’s pushing too hard on this,” she says.

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