Third in a series
Goodbye, Tulip Map.
Hello, Tulip App!
Brought to you by GVC De-Techt, The Park’s youngest tech company, this new app promises to deliver all the information Animals will need to source those juicy, fresh Tulip bulbs every Spring and Fall.
“We’re able to give you a heads-up because we keep our nose to the ground,” said the company’s proud president and CEO, R.A. Vole, at the app’s launch earlier this month.
Vole emphasized the extensive research that was required to produce the app, which will be available for download later this Spring.
“Our company prides itself on research, as well as innovation,” said the Park native who worked for another detection company before launching his own brand.
“TulipTracker has been in the works for almost a decade and our extensive testing over the last few years shows that it will shave at least a week off most Animals’ Tulip-sourcing time. It will be a great asset to small Animals, particularly to small hibernators,”
While GVC De-Techt asserts that its products are aimed at the general Animal population, Consuela Tapir says she’s fairly certain the target market for TulipTracker is “those small hibernators Vole referenced at the launch.”
While Tapir, who runs the tech rumour web site, TikTekTok, has no problem with that idea, she thinks the company should be upfront about it.
“After all,” she says, “we only need to look at this new app’s advertising slogan to see what its target market is.”
And just what is that slogan?
“We peep while you sleep,” say the latest print ads.