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OTD in 2018—Winter Solstice 2018: The Park ushers in Winter with its biggest bash ever

December 21, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

The biggest bash in Park history is about to begin.

The 2018 Celebration of the Winter Solstice kicks off at sunrise—7:48 to be exact—and will continue on, officially, until 3:00 in the morning on December 22.

“This will be the biggest bash we’ve ever hosted and it will be memorable,” director of public relations Aintza Kanariar said, as she announced the official schedule as per the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations.

This year’s festival will celebrate life in The Park in all its seasons, but particularly in Winter, despite the weather wreaking havoc on certain plans.

“We’d hoped to surprise attendees by opening the Otter Ice Slide ahead of schedule, but the weather is simply too warm for that,” Kanariar said. Instead, they’ll be setting up the mud slide temporarily.

“We all enjoy the mud slide, but this is the first time it’s been used in the Winter,” Kanariar laughed. The slide will remain open until colder weather makes the ice slide feasible.

This year’s event will once again include an original dance choreographed for the occasion by Herman Stoat, which will be performed by his eponymous dance company. Entitled, “Four in Twenty-Eighteen,” Stoat told Mammalian Daily Radio that in celebrating each of the four seasons, the dance not only honours nature, but memorializes the climate that we’ve lost.

“But it’s not meant to be sad; it’s hopeful in that it’s a call to appreciation and awareness,” he said.

New to the schedule this year is an off-site celebration at The Park Museum, which includes a sunrise ceremony of welcome performed by the Working Wounded Performing Arts Company and an interactive event for children, “Archon For a Day.”

Also new this year, the Human imitators will be replaced by a marathon spoken word performance by Mumblebee.

Other highlights of the celebration include:

  • Jugglers, clowns, and others will entertain throughout the day and night
  • Students from the Hani Gajah School of Art will be providing free tail-painting and whisker-twisting for young participants
  • Costume dress-up events will be hosted hourly by the Park Historical Society
  • Storytelling
  • Harmonious Hannah and Humphrey will be on hand for selfies throughout the festivities

The list of Park music makers who will perform appears below in order of appearance. Kanariar would not confirm rumours that Rodent Commoner reporter Gunnar Rotte will join the All Rodent Marching Band in a celebration of the involvement of The Park’s Rodent community in zoocracy.

The Feral Four
The Canary Cousins
Spontaneous Generation
Les Chiens Débraillés
SCENTient Beings
Jargonhead
Persistent Sisters
Bone Weary
The Cynics
Will.o.be
Memes of Production
Mumblebee
Last Stand
Eggie and The Pigs
ZEAL
Inktvis and Krake
The All-Rodent Marching Band
The DomEstyx
The Beasts of Burden
BHR (Big Hearts Rule) formerly NIML (Not In My Lifetime)
Fish Rap

As ever, a major component of the celebration will be the food. This year, celebrity chef Tab Tricolore will prepare another wonderful “feral buffet,” as well as supplying non-perishables from his restaurant grassRoutes. He’ll also host guests at his Park Museum restaurant, The PurrBoy Café. Other food purveyors include The Battering Ram Café, The Compost Heap, The Broop ‘n Miaow, The Draft, The Pound Gastropub, and The Cackling Goose Tavern. Mikko Tikkeri’s The Feeding Station will be once again be serving a full breakfast just after the solstice occurs as well as a buffet at midnight. Ants in Your Pantry and Provisions by Petrounel will send all celebrants home with tasty party favours.

The Celebration of the Winter Solstice begins at 7:48 a.m. (sunrise) on December 21. Food will be served throughout the event. The Solstice will occur at 11:48 a.m. Local Park Time (LPT).

Filed Under: Breaking News, On This Day, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: #WinterSolstice2018

OTD in 2014—The sun will rise and set on the Celebration of the Winter Solstice

December 20, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

Winter SolsticeThe Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations has announced the itinerary and lineup for the 2014 Celebration of the Winter Solstice.

At a press conference last night, Aintza Kanariar, the Department’s director of public relations, confirmed that tomorrow’s festivities will begin at sunrise.

“This is the third time in the last seven years that the Winter Solstice celebrations have begun at sunrise. Because of the positive feedback we’ve received from past celebrants, we have decided to make it permanent,” she said.

The 2014 Celebration will incorporate some of the most successful components of past years’ festivities with some “surprises and innovations,” Kanariar said.

Some of The Park’s most popular music makers will perform, including Inktvis and Krake, The Feral Four, Eggie and the Pigs, SCENTient Beings, The Beasts of Burden, SpontaneousGeneration, rapper Will.o.be. and The Cynics. Invited special musical guests include Thisbe and the Barkettes and The All-Rodent Marching Band.

The Herman Stoat Dance Company will perform a new work, created for the occasion. This year’s dance, choreographed by Stoat and the company’s assistant choreographer Gustav Hermelin, will celebrate what Stoat has called, “the complicated road upon which we travel.”

Entitled “Le Chemin Compliqué,” the work will feature dancers from a wide variety of species, many of whom are not part of his company and some who are not what he calls “natural dancers.”

“This year, we chose our dancers first, then gave them intensive training in performance. It was gruelling for some of them, but very satisfying in the end,” he said in an interview last week.

Stoat also said that the work requires the attention of the audience.

“This is not one you can sleep through,” he said, laughing. “It is very metaphorical in its portrayal of Park life, but we believe it is well worth the focus and it will repay, minute for minute, in pleasure and understanding,” he said.

Other entertainment acts will include jugglers, clowns, and a Human imitator. And, while students from the Hani Gajah School of Art will paint “three-minute portraits” of Solstice celebrants, the Park Historical Society will offer revellers the opportunity to dress up in a variety of costumes and represent Park historical figures.

As always, a major component of the festivities will be the food. This year’s fare will hail from Clowder, The Draft, and The Pound Gastropub. Ants in Your Pantry and Provisions by Petrounel will once again send all attendees home with tasty party favours.

The Celebration of the Winter Solstice begins at sunrise on December 21. Food will be served until 11:00 pm. The Solstice will occur at 6:03 pm Local Park Time (LPT).

Filed Under: Breaking News, On This Day, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: festivities, party, winter solstice

OTD in 2015—Faramund Stinktier signs two-book deal with Prionailurus Press

December 19, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

Faramund Stinktier

Stinktier memoir, “The Skunk Who Would Be A Zebra” to be published next year.

Faramund Stinktier has signed a lucrative two-book deal with Prionailurus Press.

The Reekabilly star, composer, and the most famous half of the SCENTient Beings duo announced yesterday that he has come to a “very favourable arrangement” with the esteemed Park publisher.

In a separate press release, Momoko Yamaneko, Editor-in-Chief of Prionailurus Press, confirmed the deal.

“Prionailurus Press is pleased to announce that, in keeping with our most recent mandate, we have welcomed Faramund Stinktier to our stable of writers. We look forward to working with him on two books, the first of which will be published in the coming year,” the press release said.

The name of that book, according to the press release, is “The Skunk Who Would Be A Zebra,” and as its title suggests, it is Stinktier’s memoir.

The singer shocked Park residents when he announced in September that he believed he was always meant to be a Zebra. He made the announcement while a guest on the Yannis Tavros radio show. In the few months that have followed, he says, he has experienced “great joy” but also “enormous sorrow” due to his shunning by members of his own and other species.

The publisher’s press release contains no information on the second book, but it is believed to be a book about music.

Prionailurus Press announced last April that it intended to promote the work of The Park’s striped and spotted community and in a brief telephone interview, Yamaneko confirmed that this is the mandate to which she referred in her company’s communiqué.

SCENTient Beings will perform at the Celebration of the Winter Solstice on December 21.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Economy and Business, Education, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: change of species, Faramund Stinktier, music, SCENTient Beings

OTD in 2012—”Non-Hibernators’ Guilt” can mar enjoyment of Winter celebrations, experts say

December 18, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

Non-hibernators’ guilt, which has been linked to Sad Cow Disease, (SCD) can mar enjoyment of Winter celebrations, according to experts

With the Winter Solstice celebrations just a few days away, experts in the field of mental health have turned their attention to one of the season’s biggest scourges: Non-Hibernators’ Guilt.

“After Extinction Anxiety, Non-Hibernators’ Guilt is the most common psychological condition we see in the Winter season,” says Dr. Gudrun L. Gibbon, a Park psychotherapist who will also serve as a staff member at The Park’s first Extinction Anxiety Clinic when it opens in January.

The condition, also known as NHG, can affect Animals who remain awake and active during the Winter season, but who have close friends and associates who are hibernators. NHG-affected Animals experience a deep sense of guilt and anxiety, concurrently with happiness, when they attend Park celebrations and important events in the Winter.

The Winter Solstice celebrations, in particular, are difficult for Park Animals. It is around that time that symptoms of NHG begin to occur, says Gibbon.

“These are the first celebrations of the Winter season, the first celebrations that are attended only by non-hibernators. In a way, they set the tone for the rest of the season. The amount of stress this puts on our non-hibernators has, I believe, been underestimated in the past,” she says.

While statistics show the number of Animals treated for NHG rising, experts in the field say the condition is not always easy to diagnose.

“Many of the symptoms of NHG are similar to those of other psychological conditions,” says Dr. Chloris Cougar, a researcher at the University of West Terrier’s School of Medicine.

In fact, some of NHG’s symptoms look remarkably similar to those associated with Feline Unipolar Depressive Disorder (FUDD), one of Dr. Cougar’s areas of expertise. It’s important, however, that we not confuse NHG with other conditions, Dr. Cougar stresses.

“There is some preliminary evidence that suggests a connection between NHG and Sad Cow Disease (SCD), but this is very, very early research and we have to be very careful about making assumptions based on it. SCD is a more complex condition and is much more difficult to treat,” she says.

She likens NHG, on the other hand, to “a stronger variation of normal.”

“It’s natural for Animals to miss those close to them who are in hibernation, especially during times of celebration. But some Animals experience this temporary loss more profoundly than others. Those are the Animals we are concerned about,” she says.

While acknowledging that much further research is needed, the two experts offered this advice, in the meantime, for non-hibernating Park Animals:

“Try to enjoy the Winter holiday season by understanding the dictates of nature. Your hibernating compatriots are not missing out on the fun; instead, they are doing what is necessary for their survival. Soon enough, they’ll be among us again, celebrating other joyful occasions.”

Filed Under: Breaking News, Health and Medicine, On This Day, Park Life

OTD in 2015—Last Stand to join lineup at expanded Celebration of the Winter Solstice

December 17, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

Winter Solstice celebrationsLast Stand, the newly-formed band whose members all hail from endangered species, will be just one of the additions to this year’s Celebration of the Winter Solstice, it has been announced.

At a short press event this morning, Aintza Kanariar, Director of Public Relations for the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations, confirmed not only the department’s invitation to the band but a number of other novel additions to the celebration’s lineup.

“We are taking a leaf out of the Groundhog Dog playbook,” Kanariar joked, as she listed a number of different performers and activities that will make their Winter Solstice début this year.

Along with Last Stand, whose founder and lead guitarist RAYdius tweeted out his delight at the invitation this morning, the celebration will include other musicians who have never performed at the Solstice, such as NIML. As well, there will be karaoke, stand-up comedy, poetry readings, tail painting, dancing, games, and athletics, among other things.

But Kanariar was quick to reassure attendants that all of the past celebratory items will be on the menu this year, as well.

“Our celebrants count on us to retain certain aspects of the event, and we promise we won’t let them down,” she said.

To that end, Kanariar confirmed that the celebration will include an original dance choreographed for the occasion by Herman Stoat and performed by his eponymous dance company. The entertainment will also include jugglers, clowns, a Human imitator, painting by students from the Hani Gajah School of Art, and costume dress-up events hosted by the Park Historical Society.

And, as always, a major component of the festivities will be the food. The suppliers of this year’s fare include The Cackling Goose Tavern, The Battering Ram Café, The Compost Heap, The Broop ‘n Miaow, The Draft, and The Pound Gastropub. Appetizers will be served for the first two hours of the celebration courtesy of Chef Mikko Tiikeri’s The Feeding Station. Ants in Your Pantry and Provisions by Petrounel will once again send all attendees home with tasty party favours.

The complete itinerary for the event will be released shortly, Kanariar said.

The Celebration of the Winter Solstice begins at sunrise on December 21. Food will be served until 11:00 pm.

Filed Under: Breaking News, On This Day, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: Celebration of the Winter Solstice, celebrations, events

OTD in 2015—Harmonious Hannah abduction: police probe link to Tartan Crab murder

December 16, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

Harmonious HannahPark Police confirmed today that they are investigating a possible connection between the September abduction of Harmonious Hannah and the 2004 murder of the Tartan Crab.

At a press conference held this morning, Chief Inspector Martin of the Murder Investigations Unit said the two crimes bear similarities that have led police to suspect a connection.

“Without going into too much detail, I can confirm that certain aspects of these cases have led us to believe there is a connection between the two crimes,” he said.

The Inspector, who has worked on the Tartan Crab murder case from the beginning, said he always felt police would be able to solve the mysterious death.

“Many in The Park consider it [the Tartan Crab case] to be a cold case, but I can tell you that police have never treated it that way. It is an open investigation to this day,” he said.

But the recovery of Harmonious Hannah, Martin says, has yielded more information than police have had access to in the last five years.

The oversized stuff toy is one half of the “harmonious pair” used by the Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS) to foster interspecial harmony among youth. She went missing in September after working a particularly difficult Stereotype Sunday and was recovered from a dumpster on November 20.

Martin said that Hannah had undergone extensive testing at the Park Police’s crime laboratory and although he offered no details as to the results, he confirmed that police had gleaned “very valuable” information from them.

Hannah remains in police custody “for the time being,” Martin said, but she will be released to the DWBS as soon as possible.

Filed Under: Breaking News, On This Day, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime Tagged With: Harmonious Hannah abduction, Tartan Crab murder

OTD in 2013—DPA confirms significant decrease in Form 12 submissions

December 12, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

Form 12The Park’s Department of Political Administration has reported a decrease of 17% in the number of Form 12 submissions this year.

“We are seeing this as a positive, even though we are not yet sure what accounts for the decrease,” said DPA spokesAnimal Antoinette Fourmi.

“Either it signals an increased willingness by Park Animals to participate in their government or it is a consequence of a shift in population numbers. Naturally, we hope the former is the case,” she said at a press conference this morning.

Form 12 is used by Animals to request exemption from the lottery that is held each January for the purpose of choosing the 35 Archons who will form that year’s government (this process is also known as sortition).

According to the rules of zoocracy, all adult Park citizens must confirm their eligibility to stand as candidates for Archon by the end of October. Illness constitutes the only exception to this rule; Animals who are ill and who believe they would be unable to fulfil their duties as Archon due to their illness are required to advise the DPA of their circumstances by submitting a Form 12.

The growing number of Form 12 submissions had become “worrisome,” Fourmi admitted. Last year, the DPA released a report that claimed an increasing number of Animals were feigning illness to avoid having their names entered in the annual lottery.

“There is no doubt we appeared to be moving in the wrong direction, but I think we may have turned a corner,” the DPA spokesAnimal said regarding this year’s figures.

See also:

Park citizens feigning illness to avoid Archon duty: report
Focus on: Sortition

Filed Under: Breaking News, On This Day, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime

OTD in 2013—Park’s retail, construction sectors expected to post strong gains after extended pre-hibernation period

December 11, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

GoUnderground


The Park’s retail sector has reported strong gains due to this season’s extended pre-hibernation period

The Park’s retail and construction services sectors are set to show strong gains in the fourth quarter, according to Xavier Dingo, chief financial analyst at A. Corn and Partners.

“It’s an ill wind that blows nobody any good,” he says. “And for these sectors, the extension of the pre-hibernation period was truly a gift.”

That extension, which was itself a result of the POPS election debacle, enabled Animals who otherwise would have been in a state of torpor to continue to spend on their hibernation preparations.

“There was a flurry of activity, at just about the time that we would have been putting away our hibernation gear,” says GoUnderground’s director of sales Nafari Bongo.

The Park’s largest hibernation outfitter is not alone. Throughout the retail sector, sales were unusually high.

“Our members were kept busy, that’s for sure,” says a spokesAnimal for the Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS). She was speaking on behalf of founder and current president Wellington Whistlepig, who went into hibernation on December 1.

The construction services sector also saw unusual gains for the season, says Dingo.

“Many Animals took the opportunity to renovate their hibernating quarters and some even built brand new ones,” he says.

Kerman Astoa, vice-president of sales for Burrows and Beyond confirms this. His construction company is The Park’s only business that specializes in hibernation facilities.

“Quite frankly, we were overwhelmed by last-minute orders,” he admits. “There was a day when we thought we might not be able to fulfil all the new orders. But we did.”

Businesses that serve Animals at pre-hibernation time were not the only ones to see gains, though. Provisions by Petrounel, the prestigious Park grocer and caterer that provides post-hibernation sustenance to many, saw its orders triple at the end of November.

“I think many Animals anticipated needing a little something extra…a little pick-me-up to get them going after hibernation, since they won’t be under for as long this year,” says the shop’s owner Beatrice T. Orang.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Economy and Business, On This Day, Park Life

OTD in 2015—Noreen to oust Yannis Tavros for one-off “Soppy Season Q&A” on Toro Talk Radio

December 10, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

lovely-to-look-at-back-cover

Noreen will answer questions about the soppy season on the Yannis Tavros show

BREAKING NEWS

Noreen will be taking over Yannis Tavros’s radio show next Tuesday.

In a press release issued today, Toro Talk Radio, the station that hosts Tavros’s daily call-in show, announced that it has booked Noreen for his time slot on December 15.

“We are pleased that Noreen has accepted our invitation to appear on air and answer your most pressing questions about the ‘soppy season,’ ” the press release said.

According to the station’s management, The Mammalian Daily advice columnist and author of Lovely To Look At: What Animals Should Know About Humans will host a live “extended public service announcement” on Tuesday. She will be taking calls from the audience on the subject of keeping safe and coping with Humans during the “soppy season.”

“We’ve all come to understand just how soppy Humans can be, sometimes,” Noreen said in an interview earlier this year. “But what many of us don’t understand is how to cope with that and how to keep ourselves safe in the face of such an onslaught of emotion.”

Almost a year ago, the Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS), which issues an annual safety alert at this time of year, announced that it was collaborating with Noreen on a guide for staying safe during the Human soppy seasons. While publication of that guide has been delayed, the DWBS has enlisted Noreen’s help in getting the word out through other media.

“What some Animals don’t understand is that there are many soppy seasons in the Human calendar and each one generates a different problem,” says DWBS director of public relations Cornelius Kakapo. “It is a much more complex issue than we originally thought.”

In the meantime, Toro Talk Radio has invited listeners to submit their questions beforehand as well as during the show’s airing.

“We anticipate an overflow [of questions], but be assured that Noreen will answer each and every inquiry, either on air or afterwards,” says a spokesAnimal for the radio station.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Noreen, On This Day, Park Life Tagged With: Noreen, Safety in the Soppy Season

OTD in 2016—Raimundo Zorro’s name struck from list of those eligible to be Archon: rumour

December 9, 2025 By Imko Oaljefanta, TMD Archivist

headsNtalesRaimundo Zorro’s name has been struck from the list of Park citizens who are eligible to become 2017 Archons, according to the gossip website, headsNtales.

In a post dated this morning, the site’s co-founder Hortencia Guacamayo, claims that a member of the Department of Political Administration (DPA), the governing body that compiles the list, confirmed the removal in mid-November of Zorro’s name. Guacamayo writes that she was told he was not deemed “eligible” to stand for Archon.

Zorro was convicted in August 2015 of two counts of inciting hate by owning and operating the controversial web site, “SplotchWatch.” In April of this year, he again caught the attention of Park Police’s Specist and Hate Crimes Unit (SCHU) by violating the conditions of his sentence and starting a new web site called, “BANDland.” The site, which is still operational, uses technology to track the movements of The Park’s striped community.

According to the SHCU’s Chief Inspector, Maurice Addax, Zorro no longer has any direct connection to the web site, although he is still listed as its founder.

As for his eligibility to stand for Archon, experts say there is nothing written in law to prevent a citizen—even one convicted of a hate crime—from becoming an Archon.

Speaking on Mammalian Daily Radio this morning, Delia Quagga, head of the Barnaby School of Government at the University of West Terrier, said that if, indeed, his name has been struck from the list, he will have a “very strong case” against the DPA.

“As it now stands, there are no restrictions on Park citizens becoming Archons,” she said.

Filed Under: Breaking News, On This Day, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime, Whoa! Braking News Tagged With: Archon eligibility, hate crimes, Raimundo Zorro

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