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Holstein Fashion signals its intent to move into the hibernation market

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Holstein Fashion

Holstein Fashion announced the creation of its two new subsidiaries today

Holstein Fashion, the parent company of Designs by Holstein, has signalled its intent to move into the hibernation market.

In an announcement issued today, company president and CEO Balbina Ko confirmed that the successful fashion house will be expanding its reach in the coming year.

“We are excited to announce the birth of two new Holstein Fashion subsidiaries, ‘Nation and ‘Nator,” the announcement said.

The companies, though created at the same time, are not “identical twins,” according to Ko. And, while the announcement was coy regarding the actual future business activities of the two subsidiaries, retail insiders claim the expansion into the hibernation market has been in the works for some time.

“The hibernation market is a very lucrative one, and for the most part, it’s been underserved,” says Wellington Whistlepig, founder and current president of the Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS).

“I think it fits well with their business model, not to mention their commitment to The Park’s striped and spotted community. It’s taken a few years for Park businesses to realize the market’s potential and, in that sense, HF is a bit of a trail blazer here, but I expect to see more and more of our businesses targeting these consumers in the coming years,” he says.

As it stands, though, The Park’s hibernators will have to make do with our current crop of hibernation outfitters. And that suits them just fine.

“We look forward to meeting their needs,” says Nafari Bongo, Director of Sales for GoUnderground, The Park’s oldest and largest hibernation outfitter.

Nesthetics gets the nod again to build Groundhog Day prognostication pad

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Groundhog Day celebrationsIt’s that time of year again.

The Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations announced today that for the second year in a row, it has engaged the services of Nesthetics to build and service the Groundhog Day prognostication pad.

In a short statement released this morning, the department said it was impressed by the sturdiness and “forward-thinking design” of the company’s 2015 pad. That pad was the first in Park history to include colours other than green.

In fact, the pad’s blue base and its range of bright colours caused quite a stir. Romulus Bowerbird, the Nesthetics designer responsible for the pad, caused a stir of his own, too, when he defended his aesthetic choices during live coverage of the Groundhog Day ceremonies by saying that he thought green was overused but, “Many of my best friends are green.”

Nevertheless, Bowerbird is considered to be one of The Park’s foremost designers, and one who is not afraid to take chances or to risk failure.

In a prognostication of his own earlier in the week, Bowerbird tweeted out that he was sure his company would be “2 for 2 on Groundhog Day.” He said nothing, however, about an early Spring.

The new face of GoUnderground: Hieronymous Hedgehog

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HGoUnderground

A series of “Hieronymous Hedgehog for GoUnderground” ads will commence next month

Hieronymous Hedgehog is the new face of GoUnderground, The Park’s oldest and largest hibernation outfitter.[pullquote]We all trust Hieronymous and we believe him when he says something. He’s as honest as any Animal can be. He says what he thinks, even when he doesn’t think.—Nafari Bongo, Director of Sales, GoUnderground[/pullquote]

The company announced today that it has signed an agreement with The Park’s much-beloved Hedgehog to produce a series of advertisements that will appear in Park newspapers, magazines, and on television. The ads will commence in October and will run until the end of November.

“We are pleased to announce that Hieronymous Hedgehog has agreed to be the spokesAnimal for our company,” today’s official press release said.

In a short radio interview this afternoon, Hieronymous said he was “pleased as punch” to have been invited to do the ads.

“I’ve been a regular customer of GoUnderground for years, as have most members of my family. I trust them to outfit me for the long Winter, and I’m not being paid to say that,” he laughed.

While this may be Hieronymous’s first commercial venture, it will not be his first encounter with fame. The Hedgehog appeared as a character in the famous Park novel, “The Way to Dr. Bourru,” and he is a regular contributor to The Mammalian Daily’s annual live coverage of The Park’s Groundhog Day events.

GoUnderground’s Director of Sales, Nafari Bongo, praised the company’s move, calling it a “perfect fit.”

“We all trust Hieronymous and we believe him when he says something. He’s as honest as any Animal can be. He says what he thinks, even when he doesn’t think,” Bongo said. “I’m confident that he will be good for our company and great for our bottom line.”

PFO head’s remark hints at new attitude to tourism promotion

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2015 Budget

 

In an interview yesterday with reporter Alfonsina Cavalletta of the Serangga Star Adviser, the head of the Park Finance Office (PFO) said she believed that tourism is “organic” and may not require much help from officials.

In response to a question about the promotion of tourism in The Park, Valentina Abeja said she believed that “tourism is an organic force and it builds on itself and from itself.”

Later in the interview, Abeja, who took office in February of this year, expanded on her views regarding tourism and its importance to The Park.

“I’ve listened to many of our shopkeepers over the past few months and they say they believe strongly that tourism is irrelevant to their bottom line. In some cases, I must say that I agree with them. In other cases, I think we could improve on our past ventures. I think we need to promote ourselves to a different kind of Human, as well as to domestic Animals. I think we missed the mark there. Perhaps if we bypass the Humans altogether and go directly to their Animal companions, we will attract a more profitable tourist. As it stands, however, our attempts have not yielded significant gains. I believe we need to revisit this area entirely,” she said.

Abeja will present the 2016 Park Budget in August.

KwikLiks: The Park’s first “flash groomer” opens its doors

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KwikLiks

Park’s first flash groomer: KwikLiks

The Park’s newest grooming house has opened in a flash and that’s not just a metaphor.

As its name suggests, KwikLiks offers quick grooming or, as its proprietress Maitea Behi says, “Flash grooming for the fast set.”

At the grand opening yesterday, Behi beamed as she offered treats to the steady stream of new customers.

“In our business, we like to say, ‘A treat is worth a thousand licks,'” she joked, as she directed Animals of every species toward the house’s bank of groomers.

With five full-time and eight part-time groomers, Behi says she can service over five hundred Animals an hour.

“A few licks should do it for most Animals. Larger Animals, of course, will take a bit more time. And for important occasions, we’re happy to take those extra few seconds to make you look your absolute best.”

While Behi’s establishment is the first of its kind in The Park, she says that flash grooming has taken off elsewhere.

“We scoped out a few venues outside The Park and even considered opening there,” she said. “But my heart belongs here. My loyalty is to The Park.”

KwikLiks’s opening at this time of year is no coincidence, either. While Behi hopes to cash in on The Park’s upcoming social season, she understands that this year the established houses may win out.

“I’m going to need to gain the trust of Animals in a flash,” she said.

Holstein Fashion lends its support to The Park’s striped and spotted citizens

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Holstein Fashion

Holstein Fashion: new EQUALSS charity supports striped and spotted Animals

Holstein Fashion, the parent company of Designs by Holstein, is lending its name and support to The Park’s striped and spotted Animals, it was announced today.

In a post on the company’s web site, Balbina Ko, the President and CEO of Holstein Fashion, explained the company’s bold move:

“Our company ‘Designs by Holstein’ owes a great deal of its success to our striped and spotted customers, whom we love and respect. For that reason, among many more, we feel we cannot in all conscience profit from our spots while ignoring the plight of others with spots and stripes.

To that end, we have established the charity we call EQUALSS. The goal of our charity is to support the full equality of striped and spotted Animals (as well as others) in The Park. We sincerely hope all Park Animals will join us in this endeavour.”

In an interview on Mammalian Daily Radio this morning, Ko explained the driving force behind the company’s decision.

“As a company, we’ve always supported the equality of all species in The Park. After all, that’s the foundation of zoocracy. But recent events and the establishment of that horrid web site [SplotchWatch] made us realize that we could be far more vocal about our support than we have been. So, we’ve taken it upon ourselves to play a leading rôle in the business community and we hope others will join us,” she said.

Ko said the company’s first move will be the production of a line of striped and spotted coats, socks, and boots.

“The design has been finalized and we expect to be able to begin production this month,” she said.

Proceeds from the sale of these items will go to a special EQUALSS fund that will aid the striped and spotted in finding employment, as well as in fighting the discrimination that has been well-documented over the past few years.

“Footpad Heaven has already signed on to stock this new line and we are currently negotiating with a number of other Park shops to do the same,” Ko confirmed.

“We also have a commitment from Appaloosa Legal Services and we are trying to bring the Extinction Anxiety Clinic staff on board as well,” the CEO said.

In addition to the outerwear initiative, Ko said her company plans to become “actively involved” in The Park’s Stereotype Sundays, perhaps producing what she calls a “learning tool” for the weekly occasion.

“We are looking very seriously at that,” she said. “If Animals volunteered to spend a day in the coat of a striped or spotted Animal, perhaps they’d think a bit differently about the issue afterwards.”

Many Animals blame calendar harmonization for economic woes

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Original Park Calendar

The Park retired the Varrrian calendar in 2012 and adopted the Human Gregorian calendar.

Many Animals blame calendar harmonization for both their personal economic woes and the persistent sluggishness of The Park’s economy, say the results of a recent survey.

The late Autumn questionnaire, which was conducted jointly by The Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS) and the Park Finance Office asked five key questions regarding personal finance and the state of the economy. The results show a significant number of Animals, though not a majority, believe it was a mistake to harmonize the calendar with that of those living outside The Park.

“It’s an idea that took hold in Animals’ minds well before harmonization and it stuck,” says current PASS president Wellington Whistlepig, whose group began lobbying for calendar harmonization six years before it took effect.

“I don’t think it’s been fully understood by some but I also believe that the hardship experienced over the past few years has made Animals more likely to blame one thing rather than to look deeper at the number of different factors that might have led to our problems,” he says.

A cornerstone of the 2010 Archons’ “Agenda for Modernization,” The Park’s original Varrian calendar was fully retired in December, 2012. The calendar now in use is known outside The Park as the Human Gregorian calendar. The last printed copy of the Varrian calendar will reside permanently in the Park Museum, which is set to open on March 1.

In a statement released yesterday, the new head of the Park Finance Office said she is taking some time to review the results of the late 2014 public consultations on the budget. After that, she will begin making recommendations for a 2015 budget, which she intends to present before the end of the first quarter. No mention was made of whether reverting to the original calendar was among the suggestions tabled.

Nesthetics remains mum on prognostication pad design

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Groundhog Day celebrationsNesthetics, the company that won the contract to design and construct the prognostication pad for the 2015 Groundhog Day celebrations, is staying mum about the details of its new product.

A short statement released this morning said that “at this time” the company does not wish to disclose any details regarding the pad:

Due to the importance of the occasion and the great responsibility that we have undertaken, we feel it would be inappropriate at this time to discuss any of the aspects related to the construction of the 2015 prognostication pad.

We are confident that upon unveiling the pad on February 2, the Park Official Prognosticator of Spring (POPS), the Archons, and all Park citizens will be pleased with its design and function.

We look forward to celebrating Groundhog Day with our fellow Park residents.

Meanwhile, gossip site headsNtales has posted what it claims is a verified photograph of the prototype of the 2015 prognostication pad. The photograph shows an oval green mound that has a border of small yellow flowers.

Nesthetics has refused to comment on the site’s photograph.

Pre-hibernation sales “brisk” as Park awaits results of POPS election

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Web

2014 pre-hibernation sales are brisk, shopkeepers and service providers report

Hibernation outfitters and service providers are pleased with their sales thus far, according to the Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS).

“2014 looks like a banner year and it comes as a bit of a surprise,” said founder and current PASS president Wellington Whistlepig this morning in an interview on Mammalian Daily Radio.

Shopkeepers and grooming houses are reporting “brisk” business this season and the banks have reported larger than average deposits.

“If sales continue at this rate, we could match last year’s figures or even surpass them, which would be an amazing feat, considering that we had two extra weeks of shopping last year,” Whistlepig said.

The 2013 pre-hibernation season was extended from November 17 to December 1, due to difficulties in calculating the votes and establishing a winner in the election for Park Official Prognosticator of Spring (POPS). The result was an increase in retail sales as well as an increase in expenditures in the construction sector, as Animals used the extra time to renovate their hibernation quarters or to build new ones.

This year, though, the Park Election Office says we can expect the results to be announced well before November 17, the official date of hibernation.

“Gone are the days of next-day results,” Park Election Office head Gerrit Wezel says.

“Our exploding population and the skyrocketing growth in the number of candidates make that impossible. But I can guarantee that we will have the results by the weekend,” he says.

The announcement likely will result in a rush to make last-minute arrangements, so Whistlepig is quick to remind Park Animals that shops will be closed until 1:00 p.m. on Friday, November 14 in order to celebrate the ceremonies of the Surrender of the Nut.

Stripe removal most sought-after service: grooming houses

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This Zebra is among the many Animals who have used stripe removal services this year

The Park’s grooming houses are experiencing a sharp spike in the number of requests for their stripe removal services, according to survey results reported in the October newsletter of The Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS).[pullquote]I think we should take a close look at these statistics and find a way to help our striped and spotted populations so they don’t need to feel they have to do this to survive[economically]. We should all be able to be who we are. — Tallulah of Tallulah’s Toilettage [/pullquote]

In the newsletter, representatives of The Park’s major grooming houses report that the number of completed procedures has increased 190% in the past two years.

These statistics were among others gathered through questionnaires that were sent to PASS members. According to Wellington Whistlepig, founder and current PASS president, the survey is carried out annually “to take our members’ temperature, to assess the state of the economy, and to see what the Association can do for its members.”

The stripe removal statistics are “a disturbing trend,” the grooming houses admit.

“And those statistics don’t even include the number of inquiries or, as we call them, incomplete procedures,” says The Mane Event’s head coiffeur Marlene Bärin.

At Amoltrud’s Aesthetics, proprietor Amoltrud says that although she advises her clients against the procedure, her salon was forced to include the service in their offerings last year “in order to keep up with the competition.”

“Sometimes we do things we don’t believe in, so that we can continue to do the things we do believe in,” she says.

Meanwhile, Tallulah of Tallulah’s Toilettage calls stripe removal “a growth industry.”

“I see no end in sight,” she says.

Her shop was the first of The Park’s grooming houses to offer such a service but she says she never thought it would become a popular option.

“We can’t ignore the economic reasons for the rise in popularity. I think we should take a close look at these statistics and find a way to help our striped and spotted populations so they don’t need to feel they have to do this to survive [economically]. We should all be able to be who we are,” she says.

See also:
Two years on, striped and spotted Animals see little economic progress
Striped Animals not getting fair share of economic pie: study
“Stereotype Sundays” aim to foster harmony among species

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