Rapper Will.o.be. pledged to donate 12 Oak Trees to The Park at the Celebration of the Winter Solstice on Saturday. The popular singer was acquitted last week on charges of abusing a Park Oak Tree on the last night of the Beats of Burden music festival.

At some point between the flyby performed by the Doves of Peace and the hilarious antics of the Human Imitator, Rapper Will.o.be. took to the stage at yesterday’s Celebration of the Winter Solstice and made a stirring pledge:

“Last week, I was acquitted of abusing a beloved Park Oak Tree, but I know there are still many Animals here who believe I am guilty,” he said.

“I know there’s nothing I can do about that. I can’t change their minds. But I can help to improve the lives of all of us in The Park. That’s why I’m here today…to tell you that, as I stand before you, I pledge to plant twelve Oak saplings on this very site in the Spring. And may those Trees grow tall and may they be as strong as the founders of zoocracy and the citizens of this Park.”

Roars of applause followed an initial moment of silent disbelief. After the popular Park singer was escorted from the stage, the celebration continued and although he was scheduled to sing a few hours later, the rap artist bowed out, calling for an encore from Jargonhead, instead.

Later on in the day, the still emotional audience left the star alone while he feasted on the offerings of The Compost Heap and The Battering Ram Café, but many were forthright in their praise of his actions.

“I think he’s doing the best he can under the circumstances,” said Dewi Beruang, who attended every Park festival this year, including the Beats of Burden.

“He’s got goodness in him and now he’s sharing it with us and I think we all appreciate that,” she said.

The Department of Well-Being and Safety has issued its annual seasonal advisory to Animals.

The Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS) issued its annual seasonal advisory today, warning Animals to be vigilant when interacting with Humans at this time of year.

“At all times, but especially during the holiday season, be aware of your surroundings and be vigilant when interacting with Humans, particularly if they are exhibiting sentimental behaviour,” the advisory warns.

“Park Animals should be on the lookout for a number of types of suspicious behaviour displayed by Humans. If, for instance, Humans attempt to entice you with food, make cooing noises at you or call you by names with which you are not familiar (such as ‘sweetie’ or ‘cutie’), if they speak of their desire for ‘animal companionship’ or say that they want to ‘rescue’ or ‘save’ you, this should prompt you to leave their company immediately. Do not hesitate to do so,” the advisory says.

“The sentimentality of the season makes Humans more likely to succumb to urges to take Animals home with them or to give them as gifts to other Humans,” says DWBS Director of Public Relations, Cornelius Kakapo.

“Especially at this time of year, Humans seem to lose the ability to see Animals as captains of their own destiny. They sincerely believe they are doing good when they remove us forcibly from our homes and families,” he says.

Any Animal who does experience a problem with Humans is encouraged to report the incident immediately to one of the following DWBS hotlines:

Feral Cat Helpline: 1-899-33725228
Assaulted Animals Helpline: 1-899-27728583
Missing Animals Registry: 1-899-64774642
Missing Family Members Report: 1-899-32645966
Youthline (Kittens, Puppies, Cubs, etc.): 1-899-96884546