• Home
  • About The Mammalian Daily
    • TMD 101: A quick guide to reading The Mammalian Daily
    • A note about our style
  • Welcome to The Park
    • About The Park
    • Past and Present Archons
  • Park Life
    • Educational Institutions
      • University of West Terrier
      • Institute for the Study of Mammalian Life
      • Leonardo Language and Culture Institute
      • The Hani Gajah School of Art
      • Park School of Aesthetics
    • Shops and Retail
    • Restaurants and Pubs
    • Financial Institutions
      • Currency
    • Health & Well-Being
      • Hospitals and Clinics
      • Directory of Park Health Services
    • Grooming Houses
      • Amoltrud’s Aesthetics
      • En Garde Hair and Skin Salon
      • Halcyon Days Canine Coiffure
      • KwikLiks
      • Tallulah’s Toilettage
      • The Mane Event
      • The Pluming Room
    • Park Services
      • Architects and Construction Services
      • Employment Service
      • Entertainment and Party Services
      • Financial Services
      • Home Services
      • Image and Consulting Services
      • Legal Services
      • Park-Sponsored Programmes
      • Personal Services
      • Real Estate Services
      • Translation Services
      • Travel & Transportation Services
    • Charities
    • Citizen Aid & Action Associations
      • Associations, Federations, and Alliances
      • Political Reform Groups
      • Environmental Groups
      • Immigrant and Citizen Aid Groups
      • Education Groups
    • Sports
  • Arts in The Park
    • Art Galleries in The Park
    • Theatres and Cinemas
    • Music Makers
    • The Barkettes
      • History and Legacy of The Barkettes
      • Thisbe and the Barkettes Celebrate 10 Years of Sensational Singing Success
      • Olden Goldies: Noreen Interviews The Barkettes
      • Thisbe and The Barkettes: Hits and Recordings
    • The Library
    • Book Reviews
  • Media in The Park
    • Newspapers
    • Magazines
    • Radio Stations
    • Television Stations
    • Publishing Companies
    • Mammalian Daily Associated News Services
  • Fun
    • Take Our Quick Quizzes!
    • See Our Ads
      • A Different Reality
      • Canine Standup Comedy
      • Fake News
      • Financial Crisis
      • Liquid Assets
      • Monkey See
      • Solid Ground
      • Who We Are
      • Think Outside the Book

The Mammalian Daily

Satirical fiction in newspaper form

Lovely to look at - Book by Noreen
  • Breaking News
    • NewsBits
    • Whoa! Braking News
  • Politics/Law/Crime
    • Groundhog Day/POPS Election and Prediction
    • Past and Present Archons
  • Economy and Business
  • Education
  • Health and Medicine
    • Media
      • Month Without Metaphor
  • Focus on
  • Science and Technology
  • Arts, Entertainment, and Culture
    • Park Life
      • Ask a Poodle
      • Enforced Domestication Awareness Month (EDAM)
      • Passings
      • Gossip and Rumour
    • Park Interspecial Film Festival (PIFF)
    • PIFF Piffle
    • Thisbe and the Barkettes
  • Noreen
    • Dear Noreen Advice Columns
  • Sports
    • Let’s Talk Balls!
  • Interviews
    • Five Questions For…
    • Survivor Profiles
  • Archives
    • Wednesday Rewind
    • Nostalgia
    • From the Vault

DWBS to Archons, PFO: Increase aid to immigrants, domestication survivors

June 27, 2016 By Adelbert Mókus, TMD Financial Reporter

Animal Aid RaccoonAs Enforced Domestication Awareness Month (EDAM) draws to a close, the Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS) has embarked on a new campaign to encourage the Archons and the Park Finance Office to allocate more funding to aid immigrants and the survivors of domestication.

In an open letter to the Archons and to PFO head Valentina Abeja, the DWBS cited alarming statistics that suggest that The Park may soon be home to many tens of thousands of Animals who have either escaped enforced domestication or found themselves homeless after the closing of a number of Human-run zoological parks.

“It is imperative that we prepare for this incoming wave of desperate Animals. It is our duty to ensure their safety and security,” the letter states.

The DWBS says there is plenty of time to increase funding for aid, since the 2017 budget likely will not be finalized until late August.

While not openly criticizing Abeja for her first budget, the DWBS suggested the PFO head take a “deeper and broader” look at The Park’s population and at circumstances outside The Park.

“Last year’s budget allocated a mere four percent to immigration and refugee support. This was, at the very least, somewhat naïve and short-sighted,” the letter says.

The DWBS has acknowledged the upcoming meeting of the Archons and the PFO head, which is scheduled for next Wednesday.

“It is our hope that this item will be first on their agenda,” DWBS Director of Public Relations Cornelius Kakapo told The Mammalian Daily.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Economy and Business, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime, Whoa! Braking News Tagged With: 2017 budget, domestication survivors, immigrant aid, refugee aid

Beats of Burden lineup announced

September 17, 2015 By Aednat Eilifint, TMD Arts and Entertainment Reporter

Beats of Burden logoBREAKING NEWS

With a lot of song and a little dance, this year’s Beats of Burden Music Festival is leaving very little to chance.

That’s not to say there’s anything boring or predictable about this year’s lineup. Far from it. There’s something for everyone at the three-day charity fest and that was a smart move on the part of its hosts, the Beasts of Burden.

“We looked for a real mix this year, something for young and old, timid and bold,” says lead singer Alfredo Ox.

Ox, who is actively involved in festival decisions, says the Beats has grown much more quickly than he ever imagined and he’s feeling the strain.

“We’re having growing pains,” he says. “I can’t deny that. We don’t want it to get so big that we lose the personal feel that it had the first year. But the bigger it gets, the more funds we can raise to support our refugee population. It’s a fine balance and a hard one to strike.”

This year, the festival has added comedy to the mix and Ox thinks it will go over well.

“We invited Woodruff Dalmatio to co-host with Jargonhead, who’s been wildly popular from the get-go,” Ox says. “They’re polar opposites but they get along well and they actually play off each other, so it will be interesting to see what happens when they’re performing live. I try not to interfere with the artists, so I don’t actually know what either of them plans. I’ll be as surprised as any audience member,” he says.

This year, the food will be provided by Coda, The Tabby Club, Provisions by Petrounel, Ants in Your Pantry, Florette’s Fine Edibles, and The Battering Ram Café.

And, as usual, the Beasts of Burden will take the stage every day and night and they’ll be acting as auctioneers during Saturday night’s gala auction. But there’s a surprise in store late Sunday afternoon: the newly minted group, The Crumb Seekers, will make their professional début, after getting the nod from Ox and Co. at last Friday’s open mic at The Draft.

“You’ll be blown away by them,” Ox promises. “Even if you heard them last week.”

Other bands scheduled to appear include Inktvis and Krake, Eggie and The Pigs, The Feral Four, The Canary Cousins, Banded Brothers, Spontaneous Generation, NIML, rapper Will.o.be., The Cynics, The Tweeters, Les Chiens Débraillés, GHC, The DomEstyx, and, yes, Reekabilly stars SCENTient Beings.

And that’s not to mention the “long list” of surprises that Ox has in store.

“Music, dance, art, games, auctions, and more. It will be the best Beats ever,” Ox promises.


The Beats of Burden Music Festival will take place at venues throughout The Park 18-20 September 2015.

All proceeds from the festival go toward assisting The Park’s refugees.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: Beats of Burden, charity music festival, refugee aid

Follow Us

  • X
  • Facebook
  • YouTube

Mammalian Daily-Related Sites

  • The Park Census
  • The Park Museum
  • The University of West Terrier

The Mammalian Daily on Twitter

  • Chef Tab Tricolore
  • Gunnar Rotte
  • Hieronymous Hedgehog
  • Mammalian Daily
  • Media's Month Without Metaphor
  • Millicent Hayberry
  • Noreen
  • Park Groundhog Day Celebrations
  • Pieter Paard
  • PIFF Reports
  • Yannis Tavros

Welcome to the Media Circus!

Looking for something?

Archives

How wise you are to read this newspaper!

Click on Noreen’s book below to get your copy now!

lovely-to-look-at-front-cover

New eBook edition cover

Margaret Atwood tweets Noreen

TMD quick links

  • TMD 101: A quick guide to reading The Mammalian Daily
  • The Best of Noreen
  • Interviews
  • Take Our Quick Quizzes!
  • Nostalgia: Celebrating 1,000 articles!

Join TMD on Facebook

Join TMD on Facebook

Click below to see what others say about us

CATCH UP HERE!

May 2025
M T W T F S S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  
« Apr    

Contents Copyright © 2025 The Mammalian Daily