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Archives for May 2017

Wednesday Rewind: Park Historical Society to produce series of short films

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Wednesday Rewind:
Original Publication Date: 23 October 2012

The Park Historical Society announced today that it has begun production on a series of historical vignettes that it intends to screen at venues throughout The Park, as well as on major television stations.

At a press conference held this morning, PHS President Clark Cascanueces said the series of vignettes, which are called “Long Story Shorts”, will cover important events in Park history from “the very beginnings of a community here, to the establishment of zoocracy and beyond.”

Asked about the impetus for the endeavour, Cascanueces admitted the PHS has been remiss in its educational duties of late.

“We do acknowledge that part of our mandate in preserving and protecting Park history is to educate future generations about their past,” he said. “And, I admit, that that part of our duty has been neglected, in part due to our involvement with The Park Museum. But, it’s come to our attention in recent months that young Animals do not appear to be as aware of The Park’s beginnings as we would have them be and, as a result of this, we decided to take immediate action. We formed an outreach committee and we have engaged the services of a number of well-known Park filmmakers, who generously offered their services to us, free of charge.”

The vignettes, which are expected to be ten to twenty seconds in length, will begin airing within the calendar year, Cascanueces said.

This is not Ronald Grouse’s first Media Circus. But it may be his best

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media-circusDespite criticism that he’s been too hard on Park media this May, Month Without Metaphor director Ronald Grouse has received almost unanimous support from The Park’s journalism community for his efforts on behalf of tomorrow’s Media Circus.

The jam-packed event, which Grouse had originally planned as a two-day affair, had its origins in the 2011 celebration hosted by the Association of Media Outlets of The Park (AMOP). But the purpose of that event was far different from what Grouse has planned for tomorrow.

“I worked on that first media circus and I remember it fondly, partly because of the innocence of it all and its sense of openness. It was very pro-journalism. We were all proud of what we did and we wanted to share that with Park residents. We also wanted to encourage young Animals to consider a career in journalism,” he told The Mammalian Daily.

“But Park media have grown in the past six years, and we— as well as our audience— are suffering from our growing pains,” he said.

Tomorrow’s event, then, will be more focused on, as Grouse says, slyly using a metaphor, “righting the ship.”

“This circus is for all, but part of it is for our own edification. I think of it as holding a mirror up to ourselves. Journalists need to take a cold, hard look at what we’re doing, why we’re doing it, and what results we’re looking for. I want to start an ongoing, thoughtful conversation about that,” he said.

Part of that conversation will include Grouse’s favourite topic, the language of manipulation. And our sneak peek into the media kit confirms that. The kit, which will be given out to all attendees, includes some of Grouse’s least favourite journalistic tools: metaphors, similes, trite expressions, and—best of all—heart strings that are meant to be pulled.

The irony isn’t lost on Grouse.

“Yes, the media kit is manipulative, but it’s all for a good cause, and that’s to do our jobs better,” he said.

“The kit illustrates what’s gone wrong and we hope it will spark some realizations. After all, our job is to present the facts as we know them, not to use words to manipulate the minds and hearts of our readers and listeners.”

The Park’s Media Circus will take place 31 May 2017 at the Ancient Open-Air Theatre, from 09:00 until 16:00.

Hayberry drops diva demeanour, plans pre-gala meet and greet with fans

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MillicentHayberry Renowned actress Millicent Hayberry will not be leaving the building early. In fact, she’ll be there well ahead of schedule.

In an open letter that was published media-wide today, the actress issued an invitation to her loyal fans to attend a meet and greet event with her at The Burrow Theatre on Friday, June 2—one day before the gala opening of her new play, Aracari.

Hayberry, who is best known for her portrayal of the late author Imogen Aardeekhoorn in both the stage and screen productions of Mixed Nuts, is not only the star of the second play of Gianfranco Colocolo’s three-part mystery series, but she is also its director.

Tickets for the gala opening were quickly snapped up after going on sale Monday and, according to Hayberry, she wanted to respond to the disappointment of many of her fans. After The Burrow Theatre gave its permission, she decided to host a pre-gala event to thank her “beloved fans” for their continuing loyalty.

It is a bold and somewhat dangerous move, and one that few actors would make.

“Had I been her director this time around, I would have forbidden it,” says Jean-Luc Briard, who directed Hayberry last year in Godwit, the first of the Colocolo mystery series.

“It’s too risky,” he said. “Too many things can go wrong. Actors need to keep themselves focused on the play and avoid all distractions.”

Nevertheless, Hayberry says she’ll be greeting fans at The Burrow Theatre from ten o’clock in the morning until “the last of my fans returns home.” No tickets are required, but be prepared for a long lineup.

Park’s refugee groups take issue with new EDAM poster

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poster-for-edamGroups that represent The Park’s immigrant and refugee communities are pressing for a meeting with the Archons and the Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS) to discuss the ramifications of what they’re calling the “not-so-hidden” messages in the new poster commissioned for June’s Enforced Domestication Awareness Month (EDAM).

In a statement this morning, the leaders of eleven of The Park’s aid groups criticized the decision to portray the domesticated and formerly domesticated as “dupes,” or as lazy Animals seeking an easier life.

“The Animals we help, many of whom bear the scars of their struggles to escape from domestic situations, are being made to suffer twice over by being portrayed as stupid, lazy, or materialistic,” the statement says.

While the groups say they agree that it’s essential to warn Park residents about the dangers of living with Humans, they feel the month-long awareness campaign need not insult those who have done so or who still do.

“Many of the Animals we assist were taken by Humans during the first few weeks of their lives and they had no control over that. And many others have chosen, out of sheer desperation, to live with Humans in domestic situations. We all do what we must to survive. There is no need to characterize these survivors as foolish,” the statement says.

The group leaders say they will continue to protest against the campaign literature until they meet with the Archons and the DWBS.

Wednesday Rewind: Some seasonal suggestions for the Spring shedder

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Wednesday Rewind
Original Publication Date: 4 May 2012

The grass is green, the flowers are in bloom, and the Birds are singing in the trees. Everywhere in The Park, the signs of Spring surround us. Not all those signs are pleasant, though. The warmer temperatures and abundance of sunshine do help to elevate our moods, but they are also responsible for one of the less agreeable rites of Spring: our annual shedding frenzy.

“It’s not uncommon, at this time of year, to see Animals literally running around in circles, biting off chunks of their Winter coats,” says Dr. Bregitta Oreamnos, chief trichologist at the University of West Terrier’s School of Medicine, and author of Hair Bawls: The 100 Most Common Complaints about Hair (The Poplar Press, 2006).

While no cure exists for our “detachment disquietude,” Dr. Oreamnos advises her patients to adopt a proactive approach to their coats, and she suggests the use of natural techniques to ease us through this season of discomfort. A few of her suggestions appear below.

“And don’t forget,” Dr. Oreamnos adds, “a good tongue-lashing can work wonders on your coat.”

The Natural Approach to Handling Shedding

SHAKE: Even undercover agents blow their covers in the Spring! Shake off that dead hair before it shakes you! A good shake before breakfast will set your day in motion!

RATTLE: Don’t just stand there — do something! Whether you’re waiting in line or hunting down lunch, remember: not all your feet need to be planted on the ground at the same time! Let’s shimmy!

ROLL: Got a nice, thick mane? Make it shine! A good, forward tumble will give you a gleam that no commercial product can match!

Excerpted from Hair Bawls: The 100 Most Common Complaints about Hair © Bregitta Oreamnos

Breaking NewsBits—Kuttu’s anti-Human views unpopular with some Archons, business owners: rumour

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headsNtales

Chief Archon Klarissa Kuttu’s views on trade with Humans are as unpopular with some of her fellow Archons as they are with The Park’s business owners, says gossip web site headsNtales. The site’s co-founder Hortencia Guacamayo says that Aristodama Tortoise and Nathan Edward Puffin went on record saying Kuttu’s isolationist policies will damage the economy. Guacamayo quotes Tortoise: “It seems she has no sense of history.”

Tickets for Burrow Theatre’s Aracari gala opening performance go on sale today

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aracari-gala-ticket-with-border

Tickets for the gala opening of the second in Gianfranco Colocolo’s three-part mystery series will go on sale this afternoon at one o’clock, The Burrow Theatre announced this morning.

Aracari, which was written by the award-winning author of Murder at the Fishbowl, has been in previews for a few weeks and will begin its regular run on 3 June. The opening also marks the directorial début of the trilogy’s star, Millicent Hayberry, for whom Colocolo wrote the rôle of the “chirpy” detective.

The production was delayed by a month due to what Hayberry told The Mammalian Daily was a certain “post-hibernation sluggishness,” but she says she is fit and well and looking forward to the theatre season.

“The response to the previews has been overwhelmingly positive and I’ve gained a lot of energy from that,” she said. “I am so grateful to all who attended and particularly to those who offered feedback on the performances.”

Hayberry, who is best known for her portrayal of the late author Imogen Aardeekhoorn in both the stage and screen productions of Mixed Nuts, credits Colocolo with giving her a “second career.”

“I never would have thought I’d have such a good time playing a detective,” Hayberry said. “I was reluctant to shed my Mixed Nuts image, but Gianfranco has given me a second life.”

Wednesday Rewind: CPAP to investigate Daffy Dill’s “natural product” claims

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Wednesday Rewind
Original Publication Date: 7 May 2012

The Consumer Protection Agency of The Park (CPAP) confirmed today that it plans to investigate claims made by The Daffy Dill that its whisker bouquets are made exclusively of “natural” products.

At a press conference held this morning, CPAP head Ursula M. Bjørn said that, in launching its investigation, the Agency was answering to a number of concerns voiced by consumers over the past 12 months.

“Consumers have been questioning the veracity of [Daffy Dill’s] claims, particularly those made about its whisker bouquet products,” Bjørn said. “We determined that these queries warranted some further examination.”

The Agency’s decision to launch its probe may also be due, in part, to recurrent rumours that non-resident Animals have been detained illegally in The Park for the purpose of harvesting their whiskers. Bjørn would not comment on these rumours, but did not deny that such activity “would be a great concern, if it were found to be true.”

While Daffy Dill owners have remained silent about the investigation, Wellington Whistlepig, founder and current president of the Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS), issued a statement just hours ago. In it, he chastised CPAP for “doing the bidding of a few disgruntled customers” and said the complaints may well have been connected to recent price increases.

“Many shops in The Park have experienced customer anger lately, as a result of necessary price increases. That is a fact of life in business, but customer anger should not be grounds for a full investigation,” the statement read.

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