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Fleck + Stone to host information session on 2017 Prognostication Pad

January 26, 2017 By Endla Metsümiseja, TMD Groundhog Day Reporter

Groundhog Day celebrationsFleck + Stone, the high-end architectural firm hired by The Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations to design and build the 2017 prognostication pad, will host an information session for Park residents this weekend.

In a short press release this morning, the firm’s Chief Architect, Vadim Kobras, invited all Park residents to the information session which will be held on Saturday afternoon at the Ancient Open-Air Theatre.

“It is of utmost importance to the Fleck + Stone team that Park residents be in possession of all the facts surrounding the 2017 Groundhog Day prognostication pad,” the press release said. “We will be happy to answer any questions about the design and execution of this important piece of equipment.”

Although it didn’t directly address the controversy over the assumed high cost of the pad, the press release did imply that Park residents would see its value:

“The Fleck + Stone team is incredibly proud of the work it has done to help celebrate Groundhog Day in this very special year. We are confident that Park residents will be receptive to our design and will appreciate its uniqueness.”

The press release cum invitation ended with the words, “We were honoured to have been chosen for this job and we remain committed to supporting The Park and zoocracy in any way we can.” It was signed by the Chief Architect, himself.

According to sources close to the firm, Kobras will speak generally about the pad and building materials and go over some of the designs the team considered before fixing on the one that was built. No illustrations of the actual pad will be revealed, but Kobras is said to have also prepared a talk that deals with the history and significance of the prognostication pad.

The final design will be revealed in the early morning hours of Groundhog Day.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Economy and Business, Groundhog Day/POPS Election and Prediction, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: #GroundhogDay, Fleck+Stone, prognostication pad

PMoCA’s “ARCHONOGRAPHY” installation opens to record crowds

January 21, 2017 By Aednat Eilifint, TMD Arts and Entertainment Reporter

pmoca-1The Park Museum of Contemporary Art’s first exhibition in honour of zoocracy’s thirty-fifth anniversary opened to record crowds yesterday.

According to PMoCA officials, “ARCHONOGRAPHY” broke attendance records dating back to the opening of the museum, itself.

“We were stunned,” said Aulikki Norsu, president of the museum’s board of directors, in an interview on Mammalian Daily Radio this afternoon.

“We were there until the wee hours of the morning getting everything ready, and when we left to go home, we saw the lineup to get in had already started.”

That was at three in the morning. By the time Norsu returned to open the installation, the line wound five times around the building. It has stayed that long ever since.

The art installation, which the museum describes as “ultra-live,” honours those who’ve served as Archons over the past thirty-five years. Every day until March 31, Park artists will be on-site twelve hours a day to paint portraits of museum-goers’ chosen Archons. All the portraits painted during the installation will hang in the museum until the end of this year.

Head curator Aamuun Maroodiga chose renowned autochthonous artist Hervé Huard, slow artist Fionn-Fionnoula T. Snail, merging artist Hugh Danlami Biri, and Clementina Araña to open the installation. At the time of publication, the group had completed sixteen portraits of past Archons.


The Park Museum of Contemporary Art’s “ARCHONOGRAPHY” runs from January 20-March 31, 2017. Admission to the event is free. 

Filed Under: Breaking News, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: animal self-rule, artists, portraits of Archons, sortition, Zoocracy 35

Mark your calendars for these important events this January

January 5, 2017 By Fiona Lupu, TMD Events Reporter

Put this on your calendarJanuary is a busy time in The Park, but this year it will be especially busy as we embark on our year-long celebration of the thirty-fifth anniversary of the establishment of zoocracy. To make sure you don’t miss anything, keep these dates circled on your calendar:

January 1-15: Eat, Drink, and Be Merry, For Tomorrow You May Have to Govern
Because we use the sortition method to select our Archons every January, we are all aware that this duty may fall to us. So, in the days leading up to the selection and announcement, spend time with your friends and family, and enjoy yourself. You may not have much time to do so in the coming year.

January 6: Otter Ice Slide Opens
We’re lucky to host all four seasons in The Park and we do enjoy our Winter. As it happens, our Otters know a thing or two about Winter fun, too, and they’re generous enough to share it with the rest of us. So, get yourself over to the Otter Ice Slide while it’s still cold out. There’s no feeling like it!

January 15: New Archons Announced
In accordance with Section 127, subsection XII, of The Park’s Constitution, the list of new Archons will be posted at the Law Courts early on the morning of January 15, an hour after the selection is certified by Mr. Justice Augustus Dindon of The Park’s Superior Court.

The list will remain posted at the Courts until the end of the week, so that all citizens and residents may review the names. The list will also be published in the January 15 edition of The Mammalian Daily.

January 16: Archons sworn in (half-day holiday)
For the selected Archons, the swearing-in ceremony will be a first; for Mr. Justice Augustus Dindon, it will be his eighteenth. This year’s ceremony will be especially meaningful and poignant, given zoocracy’s anniversary and the fact that all previous Archons and Chief Archons (that is, those who are still with us) are scheduled to appear with the new government.

January 20-March 31: PMoCA presents ARCHONOGRAPHY
To honour those who so faithfully have served the process of Animal self-rule, the Park Museum of Contemporary Art (PMoCA) will host this “ultra-live” art installation. Park artists will be on-site twelve hours a day to paint portraits of museum-goers’ chosen Archons. All portraits will hang in the museum until the end of 2017. Admission to the event is free. More details will be available on the PMoCA’s web site.

January 29: University of West Terrier Annual Open House
The annual open house at The Park’s most renowned research institution attracts hopeful would-be students, alumni, and all those interested in higher education. Come for the tour and the snacks, but stay for the annual speaker. You’ll never be disappointed!

January 31: Herman Stoat Dance Company at the Ancient Open-Air Theatre: “The Cyclamen in Winter”
As a tribute to our hibernating friends, the Herman Stoat Dance Company will give a special performance of “The Cyclamen in Winter” at the Ancient Open-Air Theatre. Admission is free.

Lead-up to Groundhog Day
One of our most important holidays (if not the most important), The Park’s Groundhog Day celebration will include, of course, the prognostication, the Archons’ address, and the welcoming home of our hibernators. Shadow or no shadow, this year’s GD celebration is sure to be a great one. See you there!

Filed Under: Breaking News, Groundhog Day/POPS Election and Prediction, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: #GroundhogDay, January 2017 events in The Park

Thank you, thank you, thank you, and goodnight: Barkettes at work on memoir

January 3, 2017 By Renée Simone Canard, TMD Gossip Reporter

halcyondaysThisbe and the Barkettes are at work on a memoir, according to the gossip web site headsNtales.

In a post dated today, the site’s co-founder Hortencia Guacamayo writes that she spoke to a musician “very close to Thisbe” who told her the singers are collaborating on a book that takes a “three hundred and sixty degree view” of their career.

Though Guacamayo did not name her source, many in the music business believe it to be a member of the Poodle duo Belles and Whistles, whom the Barkettes mentored secretly for years.

According to Guacamayo’s source, the project has been in the works for a while, but it didn’t begin as a book.

“The original idea was a television series, but with all their projects, the singers didn’t think they could commit to a filming schedule. They decided to switch to writing a book, because it didn’t require them to be in the same place or to keep a fixed schedule,” Guacamayo writes on the site.

If headsNtales is correct, perhaps we can look forward to reliving some of those halcyon days with the Barkettes.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Gossip and Rumour, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: halcyon days, memoir, Thisbe and the Barkettes

Bedfellows’ backing singer on bed rest after near-fatal attack outside Park

December 27, 2016 By Johan Slon, TMD Music Reporter

Hugo PercevejoHugo Percevejo, backing singer with the group PolyTICKS and The Bedfellows, is on bed rest today after he suffered a near-fatal attack yesterday outside The Park.

According to Kalervo Lude, the group’s manager, Percevejo left The Park yesterday afternoon to visit friends in their new home. Their visit was interrupted by a gang of Humans who threw them out of the home after spraying them with some kind of toxic substance.

Lude said Percevejo told him he was “left to die” on the sidewalk but he managed to crawl back to The Park, where he was taken by Elephant Emergency Brigade to the Park Hospital for the Afflicted and Infirm. Unfortunately, Percevejo’s friends were not as lucky.

After spending the night in the hospital, the singer was sent home and told to remain on bed rest for a week.

The group’s members issued a statement early this afternoon, confirming that Percevejo will not be performing with them at Wednesday’s Celebration of the Winter Solstice.

“We are devastated by this event and its consequences to our beloved colleague and his friends. We are heartened that Hugo will recover, but our hearts are heavy with sorrow for those who will not,” the statement said in part.

According to Lude, the group will not be replacing Percevejo at Wednesday’s performance

Filed Under: Breaking News, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture, Whoa! Braking News Tagged With: extra-hortulanial danger, PolyTICKS and the Bedfellows

Archons unveil logo of “Zoocracy 35”

December 26, 2016 By Fiona Lupu, TMD Events Reporter

zoocracy-35The 2016 Archons and the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations (DHFC) have unveiled the official logo of this year’s celebration of the founding of zoocracy in The Park.

At a press event this morning, DHFC director of public relations Aintza Kanariar introduced Chief Archon Raymond Mink, who spoke for a few minutes about Park history and the struggle for Animal self-rule. Then, assisted by his fellow Archons, he pulled the cover off a picture of the official logo.

Commissioned for the occasion by the 2014 Archons, the logo was designed and produced by slow artist Heike Slak, whose painting, “Beacon,” hangs in the Park Museum of Contemporary Art (PMoCA).

The year-long celebration in The Park, which will begin on 1 January 2017, will be called “Zoocracy 35,” Mink told the press.  Slak’s “Zoocracy 35” logo features Animals of different species standing together above the words “Zoocracy/35/1982-2017.”

Slak, who spoke briefly at the unveiling, answered reporters’ questions about his colour choices for the logo.

“In many ways, I believe my choices regarding colour make the logo accessible to all,” Slak said. “The use of green, of course, symbolizes The Park. And gold seemed like the best colour to portray the value of Park life.”

Chief Archon Mink said the logo would appear on all official Archon correspondence, as well as on all Park letterhead, and announcements about Zoocracy 35 events. In addition, he confirmed that Park shops would be selling official Zoocracy 35 merchandise, including clothing, bowls, sportswear, and collectibles. A portion of all proceeds will go to a special Zoocracy 35 Fund, which will support The Park’s most needy residents.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: animal self-rule, Park life, Zoocracy 35

2017 will be the year of the political book, say Park publishers

December 22, 2016 By TMD Books Reporter

Pile of booksA slew of books dealing with politics and zoocracy is set to be released in 2017, according to the Association of Park Publishers (APP).

Inspired by the upcoming celebration of zoocracy’s thirty-fifth anniversary, some of The Park’s most esteemed thinkers began toiling in secret a few years ago, setting down their analyses and ideas about Animal self-rule. Their work will be released in published form beginning in January.

“This is definitely the year of the political book,” says Momoko Yamaneko, Editor-in-Chief of Prionailurus Press.

“We realized that back in 2014, when we started getting manuscripts dealing with zoocracy and Park history. Some of them could have been published earlier, but we decided to wait and make it a literary celebration of this political phenomenon. We feel very privileged to have the opportunity to release twenty-five books this year on the subject.”

Other Park publishers agree. Marcellin de la Griffe, who owns and manages Marcellin de la Griffe Publishers, says his company has been working on the same theme for a couple of years. The publisher says that after wooing historian and University of West Terrier professor Pieter Paard away from Birch Bark Books, he managed to convince other prominent writers to publish their books with his company.

“Our authors— who are historians, political philosophers, scientists, psychologists, and artists—represent some of The Park’s greatest thinkers. We’re going to have an incredible year-long launch party,” he says.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Economy and Business, Media, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: Park history, political books, zoocracy anniversary

Winter Solstice 2016: all the bells and whistles, including Belles and Whistles

December 20, 2016 By Fiona Lupu, TMD Events Reporter

winter-solsticeGet ready to party hard and party long: The Park’s 2016 Celebration of the Winter Solstice will begin tomorrow at sunrise and end—officially, that is— at three o’clock in the morning on December 22.

“We’re pulling out all the stops this year. It’s going to be a celebration to end all celebrations,” Aintza Kanariar said, as she announced the official schedule as per the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations.

So fully packed will this holiday festival be, that it will be hard to find a band or a performing artist who is not participating.

In fact, Kanariar said, the only performers who will not be making an appearance tomorrow will be those who are in hibernation. Among them, of course, is Millicent Hayberry, who reportedly has sent a video message to Solstice celebrants.

In addition to Belles and Whistles, music makers who will take the stage include:

The Feral Four
The Canary Cousins
Spontaneous Generation
Les Chiens Débraillés
SCENTient Beings
Jargonhead
The Cynics
Will.o.be
Memes of Production
Last Stand
Eggie and The Pigs
ZEAL
Inktvis and Krake
The All-Rodent Marching Band
The DomEstyx
The Beasts of Burden
NIML
Fish Rap

The Endeka Elephant Band is scheduled to make a special appearance at noon, Kanariar confirmed. They will be introduced by Thisbe and the Barkettes.

Other highlights of the celebration include:

  • An original dance choreographed for the occasion by Herman Stoat will be performed by his eponymous dance company. The title of this year’s dance is “The Cyclamen in Winter.”
  • Jugglers, clowns, and a Human imitator will provide entertainment throughout the celebration
  • Wilbur J. Pika and members of the New Harmony Theatre will read selected pages from The AutoZOËography of ZoëCat
  • Students from the Hani Gajah School of Art will be providing free tail-painting for young participants
  • Costume dress-up events will be hosted by the Park Historical Society
  • Storytelling
  • Harmonious Hannah and Humphrey will be on hand throughout the festivities

As always, a major component of the celebration will be the food.This year’s fare will be provided by The Battering Ram Café, The Compost Heap, The Broop ‘n Miaow, The Draft, The Pound Gastropub, and The Cackling Goose Tavern. Mikko Tikkeri’s The Feeding Station will be serving a full breakfast just after the solstice occurs and chef Tab Tricolore will host an afternoon and evening “feral buffet.” Ants in Your Pantry and Provisions by Petrounel will once again send all attendees home with tasty party favours.

The Celebration of the Winter Solstice begins at sunrise on December 21. Food will be served throughout the event. The Solstice will occur at 5:44 a.m. Local Park Time (LPT).

Filed Under: Breaking News, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: 35th anniversary of zoocracy, Winter Solstice celebration

Winter Solstice celebration unofficial kick-off to zoocracy’s 35th birthday bash

December 14, 2016 By Fiona Lupu, TMD Events Reporter

Next week’s celebration of the Winter Solstice will not only be spectacular, it will be “a taste of things to come,” according to Aintza Kanariar, Director of Public Relations for the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations.

In fact, the annual Winter festival will be the “unofficial kick-off” to The Park’s year-long celebration of the thirty-fifth anniversary of zoocracy.

The “totality of Park life” will be celebrated in 2017, not just Animal self-rule, Kanariar told reporters at a press conference yesterday.

“Every aspect of our culture, our politics, and our life here will be represented in our 2017 celebrations,” she said. “It will be a chance for all of us to come together and acknowledge this great thing that we have accomplished in The Park.”

And, should you feel a case of Non-Hibernators’ guilt coming on, Kanariar was quick to assure that “every Animal’s species and way of life will be recognized” and every Animal will have a chance to attend the many events planned for 2017.

As for the Winter Solstice, Kanariar said the full schedule will be released on the weekend.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Park Life, Politics/Law/Crime, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: 35th anniversary, animal self-rule, sortition, Winter Solstice celebration, zoocracy

Celebrity chef to feature food of the feral world in new TV series

December 4, 2016 By Juho Morsk, TMD Media Reporter

Tab TricoloreCelebrity chef Tab Tricolore will try his hand at television again in the new year.

In a run-up to his first Feral Roots Festival in July, the chef and restaurateur will host a television series on Vertebrate Vision Television (VVTV) featuring the “foods of the feral world.”

In a joint announcement across all media, VVTV and Tricolore shared their excitement about the show and emphasized their commitment to each other, despite their troubles last year.

In a separate post on his GooseBook page, Tricolore talked about his own feral roots and his relationship with the feral community outside The Park, where he was born.

“On food gathering missions for my many restaurants, I’ve had the privilege of reconnecting with the feral communities outside The Park. They have been enormously generous to me, sharing their crops and their recipes and I look forward to doing the same with my audience. Thank you again, Vertebrate Vision, for this great opportunity,” the post said, in part.

The television series will be broadcast on Tuesday nights, beginning in February 2018, a spokesAnimal for VVTV told The Mammalian Daily.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Media, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: #FoodTelevision, Feral food, Feral Roots Festival, food festival, Tab Tricolore, VVTV

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