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Cynics to open Anixi Agrarian Jubilee

May 4, 2015 By Elspeth Duper, TMD Social Events Reporter

eatyourfoodBREAKING NEWS

It’s official: The Cynics (Philosopher Dogs) will open The Park’s annual Anixi Agrarian Jubilee on Saturday, May 23.

In a brief announcement this morning, the band’s manager, Damien Skyle, confirmed what some have called an open secret: that the band plans to reignite its career, starting with the Jubilee.

The reignition plan that has been revealed so far includes the release this month of a new version of their wildly successful collection Take the A Frame, followed closely by the opening of one of The Park’s largest and most popular festivals.

“We thought it was an appropriate opportunity to mark our new beginning,” Skyle wrote in the announcement.

“As the Agrarian Jubilee signals the beginning of The Park’s growing season, so it is fitting that it should mark a new beginning for the band.”

The Cynics have performed very little over the past few years, save for a few concerts at The Pound, the gastropub of which they are part-owners. They have also been actively involved in Enforced Domestication Awareness and last year they donated the proceeds of their song Diamond in the Ruff to that cause.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Park Life, The Arts, Entertainment, and Culture Tagged With: agrarian jubilee, growing season, Spring

New date announced for Park’s annual Anixi Agrarian Jubilee

April 19, 2015 By Fiona Lupu, TMD Events Reporter

May 23

The Anixi Agrarian Jubilee will take place on Saturday May 23

The Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations has changed the date of this year’s Anixi Agrarian Jubilee.

In a brief statement released this afternoon, Aintza Kanariar, Director of Public Relations for the department, announced the change from Wednesday, May 20 to Saturday, May 23.

“The official date of the Jubilee has always been May 20, which falls on a Wednesday this year. The Department felt that a weekend celebration would be more fitting for the occasion and as a result, we have changed the date to Saturday, May 23. No other changes are anticipated,” the announcement said.

Last month, the organizers of the Polar Bears’ Poetry Picnic changed the day of its annual event, as well. After deciding to hold the Picnic on a Sunday they announced they would make a formal request to designate the third Sunday of March as the Picnic day. The Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations has not announced any plans to do the same for the Anixi Agrarian Jubilee.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Economy and Business, Park Life Tagged With: agrarian jubilee, Spring

Whistlepig sidelined this year by effects of 2014 premature awakening: rumour

January 20, 2015 By Elspeth Duper, TMD Social Events Reporter

This year's enhanced Groundhog Day celebrations came as a surprise to festival organizers and Park citizens alike

Wyatt Whistlepig, Jr. may not attend this year’s Groundhog Day festivities

Wyatt Whistlepig, Jr. may not be well enough to attend this year’s Groundhog Day ceremonies, according to a recent post on the gossip web site headsNtales.

The site quotes a friend of Whistlepig, who claims the chief organizer of The Park’s Groundhog Day celebrations has not been well since last year’s shadow controversy occurred.

“He was forced to stay awake in order to deal with the whole mess surrounding the prognostication. He meant to return to hibernation, but it dragged on too long. His health has been fragile ever since,” says Elmo Sopuli.

According to Sopuli, Whistlepig had been seeing Dr. Bourru on a regular basis for thermal therapy until he went into hibernation in November. Sopuli says that Dr. Bourru did not think it wise for Whistlepig to be awakened for the ceremonies this year.

“Wyatt shivered through most of the year and experienced a good deal of confusion in the Spring. I wouldn’t want to see him go through that again,” Sopuli says.

Despite his troubles, Whistlepig managed to organize what Sopuli and others are predicting will be the “greatest Groundhog Day celebration ever.”

According to the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations, this year’s event will be the most jam-packed one yet, with more floats, more music, more food, and even a new dance choreographed by Herman Stoat.

“We’re going to make history this year,” says Aintza Kanariar, Director of Public Relations for the Department.

Filed Under: Breaking News, Gossip and Rumour, Park Life Tagged With: Groundhog Day, prognostication, Spring

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