The Park Museum of Contemporary Art (PMoCA) offered the public a sneak peek at its new exhibition, “Art of the Domestic Feline” today in the above slide show.
The museum will host a gala this evening. The exhibition will open tomorrow.
Majority of new Park jobs are in field of security, law: Department of Statistics
The majority of new Park jobs are in security and law, statistics say
The majority of The Park’s newly-created jobs lie in the fields of security and law, says a new report released today by the Department of Statistics and Records.[pullquote]These types of service jobs–parapolicing, for example—are creating a false impression that life in The Park is dangerous. That impression could become a destabilizing force and…lead to the need for these jobs.—Dr. Anneliese Cissa, Livingstone School of Economics and Social Science, UWT[/pullquote]
The report, which is known as, “Statistics Related to Job Creation in The Park: 2014,” is the latest in a series of reports that have been commissioned annually since 2007 by the sitting Archons.
The state of employment as depicted in the report is troubling in many ways, says Dr. Anneliese Cissa, head of the Livingstone School of Economics and Social Science at the University of West Terrier. Dr. Cissa, who has written extensively about the Park’s economy and its effect on employment, says this latest report shows concrete evidence that we are “spinning” in terms of high level job creation.
“This report shows that The Park is not just failing to generate new, high level jobs; it is still creating too high a number of service jobs. But even more than that, these types of service jobs–parapolicing, for example—are creating a false impression that life in The Park is dangerous. That impression could become a destabilizing force and could, in turn, lead to the need for these jobs,” she says.
According to Dr. Cissa, nothing has changed significantly since she wrote the report, “Seeking Greener Pastures: The Exodus of the Unwilling and Able,” in 2012. At that time, she warned that The Park was not generating sufficient jobs to keep the skilled and most diligent among us from leaving to seek employment elsewhere. Now, she says, the situation has become even more dire.
“We must allocate funds in the new budget for high level job creation. Otherwise, we will have nothing of substance to offer our young.”
PIFF 2015 sneak peek: Noon Nuttiness
The Park Interspecial Film Festival (PIFF) may be many weeks away, but today, at least, we got a sneak peek at what’s going to tickle our funny bones come October.
At a short press conference this morning, PIFF Communications President Leola Ocelot announced three of the films that will screen during the Noon Nuttiness portion of PIFF 2015:
SEARCHING FOR THE SPITMAN: A JOURNEY THROUGH FOAM, FROTH, AND FUN
Directed by Ernesto Santiago Camello
The Park | 23 minutes | Noon Nuttiness Première
We’re all familiar with our friend Stan the Spitman’s signature phrase, “Spitballs from Heaven!” Yet how much do we know about the Spitman, himself?
Not a lot, as it turns out. But writer and director Ernesto Santiago Camello has set out to change all that in this alarmingly candid short film about one of The Park’s funniest citizens engaged in one of the world’s oldest professions: spitmaking.
WOODRUFF DALMATIO: FINE LINES AND WRINKLES
Directed by Ludmilla Ptak
The Park | 26 minutes | Noon Nuttiness Première
Not just a hastily put together version of his award-winning book of the same name, but a film that shows the outrageous Dalmatio at work and at play, which for him appears to be the same thing.
NOT FOR POLITICAL PORPOISES
Directed by Cong Da Jiāngtún
The Park | 35 minutes | Noon Nuttiness Première
It takes a certain kind of mind to create humour out of adversity, and there’s no doubt Cong Da Jiāngtún has it.
Jiāngtún, whose own species is endangered, has written and directed this “tour of the everyday life of the almost extinct.”
“Life on the out and out,” he says in the film, “can be extraordinarily amusing.”
The Park Interspecial Film Festival runs 1-5 October 2015.
Noon Nuttiness gratefully acknowledges the support of The Nut Bar, the most trusted nut shop in The Park.
UWT to investigate allegations of unethical experimentation on Humans
BREAKING NEWS
The University of West Terrier announced today that it has initiated an investigation into allegations of unethical experimentation on Humans.
The announcement came in a statement signed by the President and Governors of the University and posted on the university’s web site.
According to the statement, the allegations under investigation stem from research conducted by the Department of Human Studies. No researchers or areas of research are named and the statement emphasizes the broad nature of the investigation:
The university wishes to emphasize that this is an investigation into alleged misconduct and that no particular member of our faculty or student body is under investigation at this juncture.
The investigating team consists of several UWT faculty members who serve the university independently of the Department of Human Studies. These include Dr. Chloris Cougar, Dr. Fionnula L. Fox, Dr. Hume T. Goat, Dr. Luule Aednik, and Dr. Simone Gibbon. Other team members are Dr. Berthilidis Strix, Inspector Antonia T. Fossa of the Interspecial Investigations Unit, and Mr. Justice Augustus Dindon. Dr. Milada J. Goose, head of the Honking Hollow laboratory at the University of West Terrier and a senior member of the Committee to Oversee Scientific Research in The Park (COSRIP) will oversee the team and the investigation.
Although no time frame for a final report by the investigating team was mentioned in the statement, a spokesAnimal for the university told The Mammalian Daily that the administration is committed to conducting the investigation in a fair and timely manner.
Park Museum to host major exhibition dealing with rôle of sport in Park life
The Park Museum announced today that it will host a major exhibition dealing with the rôle of sport in Park life.
In a post on its web site, the museum said the exhibition, entitled, Flyball and the Importance of Balls in the Everyday Life of Park Animals, will feature more than five hundred works including oil and watercolour paintings, photographs, sculpture, works in metal and glass, and textile impressions, “all celebrating balls and the way they inform Park life.”
Co-curated by The Park Museum’s resident curator, Dorika Pumi, and Mammalian Daily Balls columnist and sports historian, Bailey, the exhibition is scheduled to open in the Spring of 2016.
“This is the first exhibit of its kind anywhere in The Park and I am honoured that we have been invited to assist in its assembly,” said Clark Cascanueces, president of the Park Historical Society, in an interview on Mammalian Daily Radio this morning.
Cascanueces praised the museum for its “foresight” and called the upcoming exhibition a “major breakthrough.”
“For the most part, we have ignored the importance of sport—and of leisure activities— in the lives of Park Animals, “he said. “We’ve chosen to focus on survival and prosperity, but sport has great historical importance to Animals and, I would venture to say, is a necessary component of a good life.”
More information on the exhibit will be available in the new year.
Zorro verdict likely this month; court transcripts to be released in October
SplotchWatch owner Raimundo Zorro
Closing arguments were heard Friday in the trial of SplotchWatch web site owner Raimundo Zorro and the verdict of Mr. Justice Augustus Dindon will likely come down this month, experts say.
Zorro faces two counts of “inciting hate” and one count of “inciting discord.” The former charges refer to the intent of his web site; the latter refers to its effects.
Zorro, whom some have described as a disgruntled former journalist, was represented in court by his lawyer, Pernilla Varghund. Varghund is a junior partner in The Park’s oldest law firm, Terrier, Terrier, Wolfhound and Shepherd.
During the trial and in closing, Varghund argued vehemently that Zorro’s only intent in running the web site was to encourage “openness and honesty” and to let Park Animals know who among them had removed their stripes or spots.
The issue became of major concern this year when The Park’s major grooming houses reported that stripe removal had become their most sought-after service. This is likely due to both social and financial concerns, as numerous reports and studies have indicated that striped and spotted Animals do not receive equal treatment in The Park.
After almost six months of police surveillance, Zorro’s web site was shut down last March and he was subsequently charged. The original trial date was set for June 25, but it was held over until July 13 due to the temporary absence from The Park of several key witnesses.
A spokesAnimal for The Park’s court system confirmed that, in the interest of openness, the transcripts of the trial will be made public in October.
One last time: Barkettes announce final Park date of Bring Your Own Bone tour
Thisbe and the Barkettes have announced the final Park date of their “Bring Your Own Bone” tour. That date is August 22.
The announcement came in the form of a letter to their longtime fans and fellow Park citizens:
Dear friends, fans, and fellow citizens:
It is with a mixture of anticipation and sadness that we announce that our final Park concert will take place on August 22, at the Ancient, Open-Air Theatre.
We cannot fully express the joy that this leg of the tour has brought us. The Park has always been our home—not just our first home, but our only home. And over the course of the years, our fellow Park citizens have become members of our family. Every time we leave, a piece of ourselves remains here and when we return, we are made whole again.
The gratitude that we feel for the way that you all have received us after such a long hiatus is immense and overwhelming. You have touched our hearts and renewed our spirits and our love of this place and its extraordinary Animals.
Although we cannot say for sure when we will meet again, please know that you are foremost in our minds and that we will make every effort to come home as soon and as often as possible. In the meantime, we look forward to an amazing concert full of surprises on August 22 and one last opportunity to see you on this tour and thank you with our music.
All our love always,
Thisbe and the Barkettes
Archons’ office hires full-time consultant to build legacy: rumour
Gossip site headsNtales says the Archons have hired an image consultant
Only halfway through their term but with their eyes on the future, the 2015 Archons appear to have engaged the services of a full-time legacy consultant.
The Park’s “most-watched gossip web site,” headsNtales, is reporting that an agent representing the Office of the Archons had a series of meetings in June with the Maidali Margay Consulting Group. These meetings, according to the web site, resulted in the signing of a comprehensive contract for services to represent the 2015 Archons and “all Archons in perpetuity.”
In a preamble to the post, the site’s co-founder Hortencia Guacamayo writes, “We are going on the record with this and the reason is that, in our opinion, this is a despicable move on the part of the Archons and we believe that all Park Animals should know about it and protest the use of funds for such a purpose. The way to be commended for your work is to do a good job, not to hire a company to say that you have done a good job.”
The Maidali Margay Group assists individuals and companies in rehabilitating their image and making themselves more palatable to a disenchanted public. The company is perhaps best known for working with beleaguered radio talk show host Yannis Tavros after he insulted Hieronymous Hedgehog and his uncle, the late Archon Hamlin Jarvis Lambert Hedgehog. Following Tavros’s suspension from Toro Talk Radio, a consultant from the group engineered his comeback by rallying his supporters and arranging his “snout to snout” on-air summit with Hieronymous. The group’s other clients have included deposed Park Finance Officer Milton Struts, the Monotreme Savings Bank (MSB), and Fannia di Volo, editor-in-chief of the Insect Intelligencer (subsequently renamed the Serangga Star Adviser).
Mark your calendars: August 18 is Budget Day in The Park
Some say they should make it a Park-wide holiday while others say they fear the worst: that the new PFO head will do as bad a job (or worse) as Milton Struts did in his final budget.
Nevertheless, Valentina Abeja announced in a short statement this morning that she will present her 2016 budget at 11:00 a.m. on August 18.
According to an Animal-on-the-street poll conducted Monday by The Mammalian Daily, sixty-nine per cent of Park citizens are hopeful that the new budget will address The Park’s real needs. While ten per cent said they had grown apathetic about the budget, a full twenty-one per cent were downright negative about the chances of a budget that would strengthen The Park’s economy yet support our most vulnerable citizens.
But the poll, which was considered accurate to within two percentage points eighteen times out of twenty, likely does not reflect Park citizens’ real views, says Dr. Anneliese Cissa, head of the Livingstone School of Economics and Social Science at the University of West Terrier.
“That poll is out of date and the question needs to be revisited. The poll was taken when Animals were thinking of the budget in the abstract, when it was more of an idea than a reality,” she said in an interview on Mammalian Daily Radio early this afternoon.
According to Dr. Cissa, Park Animals have just now begun to realign their hopes and expectations with the reality of a concrete budget.
“It’s like a wish list,” she said. “You put a number of items on a wish list, but quite a few of them don’t make it onto your actual shopping list.”
Asked to venture a guess as to how a new poll would look, Dr. Cissa said she doubted whether there would be significant movement in the apathetic column.
“Perhaps a percentage point or two, I would imagine,” she said. But as for the other feelings expressed in the first poll, she had a surprising answer:
“I think some of the hopefuls will have turned unhopeful with the news [of budget day] and some of the unhopefuls will become resigned in time. So, I think within a few days, the realignment will look more like fifty-fifty than sixty-nine-twenty-one.”
And on budget day?
“I think we’ll all cycle through a range of emotions from hopeful to cynical to skeptical to disappointed and then most of us will park ourselves at thoughtful. And it is only from there that we will begin to be able to judge the value of this new budget,” she said.
Park ART Walk 2015, Extinction Anxiety Clinic join forces to celebrate work of endangered species
BREAKING NEWS
The organizers of the 2015 Park ART Walk (PAW) announced today that they have collaborated with the Extinction Anxiety Clinic (EAC) to celebrate the artistic endeavours of The Park’s endangered species.
In a joint statement released this morning, the Park ART Walk organizers, the Extinction Anxiety Clinic, The Park’s Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations, the Founding Families Financial Corporation, and the All Species Credit and Commercial Bank, confirmed the theme of The Park’s 9th annual Park ART Walk:
“We are extremely pleased that, though our work together, the 2015 Park ART Walk will be able to bring into focus the creative output of our endangered species.
The Park is extremely proud of the resilience of its threatened population and we want to shine a light on the ways in which they have enriched the lives of all Park residents. These are Animals who suffer profound anxiety as a way of life, yet they are able to contribute greatly to their families, to their community, and to the creative arts. They are truly an inspiration to us all,” the statement says.
Underwritten in part by the Founding Families Financial Corporation, the Park-wide exhibition will be entitled, “Art: Against All Odds.”
This is the fourth time in its history that the Park ART Walk has had a distinct theme. Last year, PAW honoured The Park’s refugees in “From Fear to Freedom.” In 2013, our autochthonous artists were highlighted in the exhibition, “From the Ground Up.” In 2012, thanks to a one-time gift from The Archons’ Initiative Fund, the event showcased art as it related to the theme, “INtegration through ART.” The stated goal of that themed exhibition was to “encourage Animals to learn more about species other than their own, so that we can understand our differences and our similarities.”
The Park ART Walk is a one-day, juried art exhibition that showcases the artistic expression of Park residents. The 9th annual Park ART Walk will take place on Saturday, August 15, 2015 between the hours of 10:00 am and 7:00 pm. Showings will take place at participating art galleries, shops, theatres and cinemas. This year’s jury will include curators from the Park Museum of Contemporary Art and the Tortoiseshell Gallery.
