The Mammalian Daily

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In the midst of turmoil, the Solstice brings solace to The Park

By

christmas

Drawing courtesy of Hani Gajah School of Art

The sun rose and set yesterday on the Celebration of the Winter Solstice.

The Doves of Peace circled high above while the Does wound their way through the crowd. But it wasn’t until 6:03 in the evening, when the sun stood still, that Park celebrants finally felt a sense of calm.

“That’s when I knew things were going to be all right,” says Dewi Beruang, who always attends the Celebration.

“That’s when I thought, ‘We will work this out. Zoocracy is too good a concept to fail.'”

The last minute lifting of the curfew that Police had imposed on Park Animals on December 8 added a needed boost to the festivities, as well.

“We were hoping it would happen, but we couldn’t be sure until we got the word at about noon,” says Aintza Kanariar, Director of Public Relations for The Park’s Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations.

“Then, a huge cheer went up through the crowd and I knew we were in for the long haul.”

That “long haul” lasted well past midnight. The food stations stayed open, the bands played extra sets, and the students from the Hani Gajah School of Art switched from painting portraits to painting faces. Even the Herman Stoat Dance Company offered an encore performance.

And all of it was appreciated. After the past few weeks of uncertainty, unrest, and outright fear, attendees seemed delighted to enjoy each other’s company and to look to the future again.

“It was … magical,” says Beruang. “Simply magical.”

The sun will rise and set on the Celebration of the Winter Solstice

By

Winter SolsticeThe Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations has announced the itinerary and lineup for the 2014 Celebration of the Winter Solstice.

At a press conference last night, Aintza Kanariar, the Department’s director of public relations, confirmed that tomorrow’s festivities will begin at sunrise.

“This is the third time in the last seven years that the Winter Solstice celebrations have begun at sunrise. Because of the positive feedback we’ve received from past celebrants, we have decided to make it permanent,” she said.

The 2014 Celebration will incorporate some of the most successful components of past years’ festivities with some “surprises and innovations,” Kanariar said.

Some of The Park’s most popular music makers will perform, including Inktvis and Krake, The Feral Four, Eggie and the Pigs, SCENTient Beings, The Beasts of Burden, SpontaneousGeneration, rapper Will.o.be. and The Cynics. Invited special musical guests include Thisbe and the Barkettes and The All-Rodent Marching Band.

The Herman Stoat Dance Company will perform a new work, created for the occasion. This year’s dance, choreographed by Stoat and the company’s assistant choreographer Gustav Hermelin, will celebrate what Stoat has called, “the complicated road upon which we travel.”

Entitled “Le Chemin Compliqué,” the work will feature dancers from a wide variety of species, many of whom are not part of his company and some who are not what he calls “natural dancers.”

“This year, we chose our dancers first, then gave them intensive training in performance. It was gruelling for some of them, but very satisfying in the end,” he said in an interview last week.

Stoat also said that the work requires the attention of the audience.

“This is not one you can sleep through,” he said, laughing. “It is very metaphorical in its portrayal of Park life, but we believe it is well worth the focus and it will repay, minute for minute, in pleasure and understanding,” he said.

Other entertainment acts will include jugglers, clowns, and a Human imitator. And, while students from the Hani Gajah School of Art will paint “three-minute portraits” of Solstice celebrants, the Park Historical Society will offer revellers the opportunity to dress up in a variety of costumes and represent Park historical figures.

As always, a major component of the festivities will be the food. This year’s fare will hail from Clowder, The Draft, and The Pound Gastropub. Ants in Your Pantry and Provisions by Petrounel will once again send all attendees home with tasty party favours.

The Celebration of the Winter Solstice begins at sunrise on December 21. Food will be served until 11:00 pm. The Solstice will occur at 6:03 pm Local Park Time (LPT).

On the comeback trail, Thisbe takes a moment to say “thank you” to her fans

By

Thisbe Laulaa cover

“I didn’t realize how important my fans were to me.”

TMD EXCLUSIVE: Excerpt from Laulaa® Magazine
Although Thisbe needs no introduction in The Park, she says that this time around, she’s determined “to let my fans in as much as possible so they know who I really am.

As the founder and lead singer of The Park’s most popular group prepares for a comeback tour, she appears more settled and thoughtful than before.

“I didn’t realize how important my fans were to me,” she says in an exclusive interview in Laulaa® Magazine, due out on December 25.

“And I think they deserve a little more than I’ve given them … not in my singing so much, but in my time and thought.”

The singer has had a lot of time for thought the last few years. Since cancelling the group’s farewell tour in 2007, Thisbe has suffered from a variety of illnesses, the worst of which she says was melancholia.

“When I had to stop performing, I thought I would enjoy it. There were so many things I’d never done … so many of my senses I’d never used. But it didn’t turn out to be that way at all. First, I lost one of my littermates. And even though we weren’t exactly close, that loss hit home. It made me focus on what I really wanted and what I wanted to do. I could see that time was of the essence. But it took me a while before I could use that realization to any advantage. And in the meantime, I kept myself isolated, which was the exact opposite of what I had planned,” she says.

The star credits her fans, who never forgot her, with re-awakening her interest in living.

“I never lost my bark but for a while, I lost my bite,” she laughs.

The full interview with Thisbe will appear in Laulaa® Magazine, The Official Magazine of the Canine Music Association, on December 25, 2014. 

DWBS advises Police to ease curfew, lift ban on travel for Winter celebrations

By

DWBS: ease curfew, lift travel ban

The Department of Well-Being and Safety (DWBS) has advised Park Police to ease the curfew for Park Animals and to lift the current ban on travel outside The Park in advance of the Celebration of the Winter Solstice.

After a meeting this morning with the Archons, DWBS Director of Public Relations Cornelius Kakapo announced the recommendation.

“After private consultations with the Archons, the Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS), and members of The Park’s health and welfare communities, the Department of Well-Being and Safety has reached the conclusion that it would be detrimental to the emotional, physical, and financial well-being of Park Animals to restrict their movements and cut short their celebration of the Winter Solstice,” he said.

Kakapo also confirmed that a series of meetings with the Park Association of Shops and Services (PASS) had convinced the department that continuation of the travel ban would have dire economic consequences for Park businesses, especially those that are food-related.

“We realized that we are risking impoverishment in our quest for security. We must be wary of overreaching in that regard,” he said.

Neither the Archons nor Park Police have commented thus far on the DWBS recommendations. The curfew and travel ban were enacted on December 8. The Celebration of the Winter Solstice takes place December 21.

SplotchWatch web site a dangerous sign of the times, say Park Police

By

SplotchWatch

Web site names those who have had spots or stripes removed

A new web site could mean trouble for Park Animals and, ultimately, for zoocracy itself, Park Police tell The Mammalian Daily.

The web site, called “SplotchWatch,” has been under surveillance “for a few months now,” according to Chief Inspector Maurice Addax of The Park Police Force’s Specist and Hate Crimes Unit (SHCU).

“Its only purpose, as far as we can tell, is to name Animals who have had their spots or stripes removed,” he says. “It’s a dangerous sign of the times.”

The owner and operator of the site, whose name police will not reveal at this time, believes it is in the interest of “openness and honesty” to let Park Animals know who among them has altered their appearance.

“The owner of the site seems to believe that there is something intrinsically dishonest about that [stripe or spot removal] and his mission is to ensure that all Park Animals are made aware of this form of deception,” Addax says.

Police will continue to watch activity on the site and assess the effect it may or may not be having on Park life.

“If we see that the site is inducing hatred or violence toward any Animal or group of Animals, we will move in swiftly,” he says.

Otherwise, the operator of the web site is acting within his rights.

“He [the site’s owner] is walking a fine line here,” says Addax. “And we hope he realizes it.”

With or without him, Tricolore’s resto to serve food at Winter Celebration

By

Tab Tricolore

The celebration will go on, with or without Tab Tricolore

The celebration must go on, they say. So, with or without their boss, Tab Tricolore’s restaurant will be serving food at the Celebration of the Winter Solstice on December 21.

In a statement released this morning, Aintza Kanariar, public relations director of The Park’s Department of Holidays, Festivals and Celebrations confirmed that Tricolore’s family restaurant, Clowder, will be among the establishments providing the celebration’s festive fare.

“We checked with Clowder’s manager and he says all systems are go,” Kanariar said when asked to elaborate on the subject in a radio interview this afternoon.

“I think we all feel that it’s what Tab would want,” she said.

In an article published yesterday in The Silvestris Star, Tricolore’s former saucier Barry “Béarnaise” Burmilla said all Tricolore’s staff members were “pulling together” to make sure the restaurants ran smoothly in their boss’s absence.

“We miss him and we need him, and we want to make sure that there are no problems for him when he finally returns,” Burmilla said.

In the meantime, Park Police say they have no news on Tricolore’s whereabouts.

UWT Human Studies course will use television to teach Human motivation

By

University of West Terrier coat of armsThe Department of Human Studies at The University of West Terrier has green-lighted a new course that will use footage of Human television shows to teach students about Human motivation.

In a brief announcement posted on the university’s web site yesterday, the President and the Board of Governors of the university confirmed the addition of the new course to the undergraduate curriculum.

“The President and Governors of the University of West Terrier and the head of the Department of Human Studies are pleased to announce the expansion of the Department’s curriculum in 2015,” the announcement reads.

As of September 2015, the announcement says, students who are attending the University and have completed at least one full year of study will be eligible to enrol in the new course, which is listed as HS 207.

Although the course description has not been finalized, the head of the Human Studies Department confirmed that learning materials will include footage of television shows that are made by and watched by Humans.

“Thanks to an agreement signed last January between the University of West Terrier and the Avian Messenger’s ‘Birds on the Wire,’® service, we have been able to obtain footage of some Human television programming. This material has proven to be extremely valuable in the understanding of  Human motivation and the Human value system and we feel fortunate to be able to offer this to our students,” she said.

The announcement did not include any information regarding the course instructor, but many believe the department will appoint Noreen, since she has expertise in the field. The adjunct professor is currently on leave to promote her book, Lovely To Look At: What Animals Should Know About Humans and will return to her teaching duties in the Autumn.

The full announcement from the University can be read here.

Inktvis and Krake to join lineup for Celebration of the Winter Solstice

By

3-hearts-1-headInktvis and Krake will be joining the lineup of musical performers at this year’s Celebration of the Winter Solstice, their agent confirmed today.

In a short communiqué released this morning, the agent said they were “very much looking forward to performing at this joyful celebration.”

This will be the second time the aquatic duo has performed at the Celebration of the Winter Solstice and the live performance coincides with the re-release of their most successful collection, 3 Hearts, 1 Head.

Other performers who have confirmed their appearance this year are The Feral Four, Eggie and the Pigs, SCENTient Beings, and The Beasts of Burden. For the third year in a row, the Herman Stoat Dance Company will perform a new work choreographed for the occasion.

The full itinerary for the event will be released shortly, according to the Department of Holidays, Festivals, and Celebrations.

The Celebration of the Winter Solstice begins at sunrise on December 21. Food will be served until 11:00 pm.

Newspaper editorial should not be ignored, say Park’s aid groups

By

Rodent Commoner

 

An editorial published last week that has ignited a firestorm of protest, has endangered the life of its writer, and has resulted in a curfew and a ban on travel outside The Park “should not be ignored,” say members of The Park’s aid groups.

“[Reporter Gunnar Espen] Rotte makes a valid point, in that you don’t have to have stripes or spots to be treated badly, inside or outside The Park,” says Rosbritt Piggsvin, head of the aid association Rodents at Risk.

“Almost all of us have all suffered from some sort of prejudice in our lives,” she says.

Inez Gallina, president of the immigrant aid group Home to Roost, agrees: “It’s not just prejudice. It’s more than that. I sometimes think it’s a holdover from the way we’re treated outside The Park. I think it spills over into our immigrants’ lives here. Native Park citizens make assumptions about us, based on what they’ve heard outside The Park. It can be devastating to a new immigrant, especially a refugee,” she says.

But Hendrik Dalmatiër of the Spotted Animal Alliance says these Animals are missing the point.

“This is not a contest about which Animal has a harder time. There is no winner here; there are only losers. It is our opinion that if a Park treats its Animals differently on the basis of appearance, we are all losers. And there is plenty of evidence that that happens,” he says.

Police impose curfew, ban on travel amid protests and disappearances

By

FCSW President Gareth Shepherd

Gareth Shepherd: curfew, ban on travel outside The Park

DEVELOPING STORY
After an overnight series of consultations with the Archons and the Department of Well-Being and Safety, Park Police announced today that they have imposed a curfew on Park residents and a ban on travel outside The Park.

Gareth Shepherd, a 17-year veteran of the force and president of the Federation of Canine Security Workers (FCSW), made the announcement this morning at a hastily-arranged press conference.

The announcement read as follows:

Due to recent events, including violent protests, threats on the lives of Park Animals, and a number of mysterious disappearances, the Archons and the Park Police have made the decision to impose order on The Park by establishing a 10:00 p.m. curfew on all residents, as well as a ban on travel outside The Park.

More details of these arrangements will be made public shortly. For now, please be advised that officers will be permanently stationed at all Park exits and will begin making rounds at 9:50 this evening.

Park Police and the Archons are appealing to all residents to respect this decision. It was made with the welfare of all in mind.

Shepherd also confirmed that they have enlisted the assistance of the Does of Peace in this effort.

The new restrictions come into effect tonight, December 8, 2014.

This story will be updated as more information is gathered.

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